cWo presents Driven 38!
Live from The Air Canada Centre in Toronto, Ontario, Canada
Thursday, October 2, 2008
Thursday, October 2, 2008
All things must pass
[The show begins with the sight of Tony "Totally" Awesome looking sternly into the camera as he sits behind his desk. We hear cheers from the audience in the Air Canada Center watching the big screen in the arena as Awesome begins to speak.]
Tony "Totally" Awesome: cWo fans, I would like to first and foremost like to say thank you. Thank you for sticking with us through the most enduring times in cWo history. But I'd also like to echo a statement made by Jason Duran last week when I say hopefully there's a light at the end of this long tunnel. But my purpose for addressing the cWo locker room and fans alike tonight is to make a few announcements to help us get closer to that light.
Heretic's influence has been spreading uncontrollably over the past two months and it's becoming clear that if something isn't done about it then cWo will go to hell in a handbasket sooner than we know it. It's my job to do something about it and that's exactly what I'm gonna do, there are a lot of rivalries that need to be settled and settled fast.
So here's what you can expect to see on the card for "To Hell and Back." It's going to be Evette defending her Womens Championship whether she likes it or not, against my niece Lana Lexington.
[The fans cheer the announcement.]
Tony "Totally" Awesome: We're also going to see Barrett Hawk going on on one against Mike Logan. In a Texas Bullrope Match.
[Fans cheer even louder for the second announcement.]
Tony "Totally" Awesome: But that's not even the half of it. We're also going to see Mr. Rich in action against Sean Pason.
[Fan reaction amplifies in excitement for a hot Sean Pason.]
Tony "Totally" Awesome: And on special request from the HotShot himself, we're gonna see Nick Dangerous taking on HotShot Chris Michaels.
[Awesome smiles as the fans continue to cheer.]
Tony "Totally" Awesome: And last but definitely not least. Chazz Mendel will once again go one on one against Christian Roman.
[Fans continue to react with a heavy enthusiasm as Awesome's smile grows larger.]
Tony "Totally" Awesome: And let's all hope that when the scores are settled someone will finally step up and make Heretic's hold over the cWo a distant memory...
[The scene fades out as the show intro begins.]
Intro
The cWo logo is shown and it begins to spin, but instead begins to catch fire. The logo is engulfed in flames and dissappears as Heretic's laughter can be heard. The entire screen erupts in flames revealing the usual Driven intro underneath. Sevendust's "Driven" begins to play as we see clips of the following weeks programs. Christiano is seen pacing to the mocking the fans. Then clips of him beating up on Starkiller and Andrew Phillips is shown. Then Christiano goes up into flames. A quick flash of Captain Magnificent saving a cat from a tree proceeds the mad cow taunting him on the rampway. Captain Magnificent unmasks the Mad Cow at Eye of the Storm, but Mad Cow image flashes on the screen before going up in flames. From ashes, Mr. Rich walks down to the ring with the interns. This is followed by a sad looking Andrew Phillips seeking down sulking being made fun of by Mr. Rich. A depressed looking Andrew Phillips appears in front of a blank screen. I AM DRIVEN appears on the screen but the word DRIVEN gets crossed out in red and replaced with a different word.
I AM DAMNED
The picture switches and Mr. Rich appears in front of the blank screen
I AM cWo
Then the screen goes up in flames again.
Mad Maddie double crossing spearing Brother Shabazz, followed Maddie betraying Estrogen Uprisng by spearing Jen Diamond! This is followed by Maddie getting pinned by Chastity McGavin. Next is Phantasy walking to the ring, followed by her getting V-20'ed by Chastity McGavin. This is followed by Chastity McGavin's entrance with Mary-Joe following her then shots of her various squash matches this is cut with footage of Jen Diamond's history with company and her squash matches over the last few weeks. Their compilation ends with Chastity and Diamond fighting with Mary-Joe in the middle at SITS! Then Chastity screwing Diamond out of the match at EOTS and pulling Jezebel over her. Then the two of them fighting and Mary-Joe getting pushed to the side. AFter that Lana Lexington's first appearance, being introduced by Tony Awesome is shown. But underneath a burst of flames, she is crying in the locker room over her loss. Evette is shown escorting Mr. Rich to the ring, then gaining a pin fall in one of her tag contests, then hitting the "Dirty Little Secret" on Lana. This is followed by her holding up the Women's title. A sad looking Lana Lexington standing next to a Jen Diamond is shown. Driven is once again crossed out.
I AM FLAWED
Flames flash across the screen revealing Evette holding up her Women's title front and center, behind her is the hulking silhoutte of Chastity McGavin.
I AM cWo
Clips of Devon Dice's first matches in the company are shown followed by his world title win and ending with him walking to the ring with an ivory tooth pick in his mouth after his gentlemen's make over. This is followed by clips of Raymond Jacobson hitting the RJA on several of his opponents. Then him making Devon Dice tap out at Eye of the Storm. But then him and JJ Carter shoving eachother back and forth. Next Pason is shown busting through the monumental structuren, then beating up on Thaddeus Walker at Eye of the Storm. Chandler Dalmon's first appearance as a member of BRATS is shown and then his re-birth followed by his alingment with the WGL. Then him pinning Josh Cantrell for the title is featured. Next JJ Carter's storied past is shown. First him battling with Roman, then the Wraith. Then him and Brother Shabazz taking on the Estrogen Uprising. And finally, him pinning Jacobson for a chance to win the United STates title, but then him getting pinned by Dalmon. JJ Carter appears in front of the blank screen.
I AM UNFORGIVEN
The screen then switches to Chandler Dalmon holding the U.S title over his shoulder.
I AM cWo
The screen then gets engulfed in flames once more.
Barret Hawk's first appearances are shown as well as Mike Logan's first match. The two men standing side by side during World War II and then Mike Logan holding a blow up doll with the name "Charlene" on it. This is followed up by Barret beating the living crap out of him. This is followed by several clips of Chris Michaels storied career! His title reigns and battles with Roman are shown. Even moments from his presidency campaign are shown. Then Michaels declaring to Pilchard and Fiasco that he will come back to cWo on his own terms and then his run in on the Driven before SITS! After that shots of Pilchard ridding the fed of Andrew Fiasco! Then Christian Roman's long cWo career is shown, featuring every title run and several matches with the likes of Notorious Jon and Chris Michaels. Next Nick Dangerous's long career is featured. His battles with Ryne Deth, Sean Pason, Cantrell and Serious is seen. Then him attacking Serious at Cyberslam, the several appearance of Pilchard and then Dangerous making his return. This is followed by Chazz Mendel during his title reign and his several pin fall victories over CBK. Him calling out Christian Roman is seen. This is followed by Christian and Michaels standing face to face with Chazz and Dangerous. Christian Roman appears in front of the blank screen.
I AM FORSAKEN
The image changes to Chazz Mendel with a smirk on his face.
I AM cWo
From beneath the flames Johnny Serious is shown holding the World Title which is followed by him holding the United States title. And then him raising his arm in defeat of Nick Dangerous. This is followed by Josh Cantrell's first few matches, then his battle with Nick Dangerous and then him winning the United States title from Jacob Baxter. Next up is Jacob Baxter talking to Tiffany Tolberg, then hitting the hooligan kick on several opponents and then him finally hitting the hooligan kick on Cantrell. The three men are shown in the cell at Eye of the Storm, a battered and bloody mess. The scene ends with CAntrell double crossing Serious and then pinning him. Serious appears before the blank screen.
I AM A TOY
His image changes to that of Josh Cantrell
I AM cWo
Heretic enters the ring with Jen Diamond and Notorious Jon, this then cuts to Heretic crippling Notorious Jon and then him holding down Jen Diamond in the middle of the ring! Then shots of him beating down Muru in an I Quit match at Glory! After that clips of him walking with Andrew Phillips children and then him confronting Phillips on the stage. Then Heretic pinning Phillips in the middle of the ring at SITS, then him holding the title! Heretic appears before the blank screen with the title over his shoulder!
I AM EVERYWHERE
Finally he is seen atop the cell, wacthing Baxter, Cantrell and Serious beating the crap out of eachotherHeretic appears in front of the blank screen again with the title!
I AM cWo
The whole screen gets engulfed with flames as Heretic's laughter is heard once more.
[The camera cuts to the inside of the Air Canada Centre. The Canadian crowd cheers widely as the pyrotechnics erupt all through the arena as a new voice welcomes the TV audience.]
Joel Nelson: This capacity crowd is on their feet, as we join you LIVE from Toronto for cWo driven!!!!
[The camera pans the crowd. Among the featured signs are “I believe in The Hot Shot” “GET SERIOUS End Heretic” and “The Mad Cow moooves me” The camera then cuts to Robbie Hart at the announce table along with cWo’s new young broadcaster, Joel Nelson.]
Nelson: Hello everybody, my name is Joel Nelson, and I'm joined by the one and only Robbie Hart. First off, let me say that it is truly an honor to be here tonight calling the action with you.
Hart: You're calling the action with me? I thought you were just his seat filler!
Nelson: Ha! Man, I couldn't wait for your first joke..
Hart: I'm not joking. How old are you, nine?
Nelson: Twenty four, and I'm a cWo fan just like everyone watching. I've watched this organization over the last eight years, and it's really surreal to be here now a part of cWo.
Hart: You're boring the people!
Nelson: Well, you're the old pro, what do you suggest?
Hart: Old pro? I'm not old!
Nelson: I wasn't saying…
Hart: I'm hip and with the youth of America. The digit is dizzle for rizzle, my nizzle.
Nelson: Whatever you say, Robbie…
Fight or Flight
["Living in the Sunlight, Loving in the moonlight" plays and the crowd's boos are deafening as Heretic steps out from behind the entrance curtain.]
Nelson: Talk about on the job training!
[Heretc laughs at the crowd as he heads towards the ring. He looks over at the announce table and does a double take, staring at Joel Nelson.]
Heretic: WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?
Nelson: Um.. .. I'm..
[Heretic laughs again, the climbs into the ring.]
Hart: Joel, meet Heretic.
Nelson: Yeah, that was something I wasn't looking forward to. I actually remember supporting Heretic back in 2001 when he went into Hell and Back to win his second world title. Looking back, I can't believe these are the same guys.
Hart: It's not the same guy.. well, I guess it is, but you know what I mean!
[The crowd boos as Heretic takes the mic]
Heretic: My friends..
[The crowd boos louder.]
Nelson: We're not your friends!
Heretic: Well, my dear friends, everyone's talking about it. They can FEEL IT, from the top of cWo down to the bottom. It's effecting every single FACET of cWo! It's the DARKNESS, the BLACK CLOUD that is hanging over everything! I'm not stupid, I can see it just as well as anyone else. But don't think for a minute that this is MY FAULT!
Nelson: It's not his fault?
Hart: .. I need to hear this one!
Nelson: Me too! This has been ENTIRELY his fault, all of it!
Heretic: Look at the world in which we live, friends. CHAOS. The world's financial giants are CRUMBLING. Every week another country aquires a nuclear weapon, big countries are just WAITING to take over smaller ones. This world is bottoming out. Everything held dear is DYING. But it's not MY fault! I wasn't the CAUSE I wasn't the CATALYST.... if anything, I'm simply the BYPRODUCT!
Nelson: Well, an expectedly cynical world view from the world champion here..
Heretic: What links us ALL, my friends, is CHAOS. We're animals. Sure, we can speak and dress ourselves, but we have basic animal instincts.... FIGHT OR FLIGHT has kept us alive for milions of years! But somewhere along the way, we repressed these urges, hid our TRUE NATURE. We became CIVILIZED, and that was our DOWNFALL. Now, that civiliazation is at an end. It's all coming apart at the seams, and chaos, the true binding force in the universe, IS TAKING OVER! There's a lot of talking about CHANGE and HOPE and THE FUTURE. Well, the future's now... and it's an era of Chaos... MY TIME. You see, soon you'll all understand what must be done to SURVIVE! I'm not out to save anyone. I'm not out to lead us into some glorious new future, I'm out to SURVIVE. I'M CHANGE, maybe not CHANGE YOU CAN BELIEVE IN, but CHANGE YOU NEED TO ACCEPT! The way to navigate through the darkness is to RECOGNIZE YOURSELF. Throw away your CIVILIATION and embrace WHO YOU REALLY ARE.... ACCEPT THE CHAOS. EMBRACE IT. And realize that we all have only two options, FIGHT OR FLIGHT!
Hart: I'd choose flight right about now.
Nelson: You said it, Robbie!
Heretic: Now my dear friends, let's talk abouy Johnny Serious. Here is a man who DOESN'T KNOW WHO HE IS! HE doesn't see that FUTILITY of his LIFE. He wants what I have... but he won't take the NECCISARY STEPS to get it! WHY COULDN'T YOU MAKE PILCHARD BLEED, JOHNNY?! IT WAS AN EASY TASK! YOU WANTED TO DO IT, SO WHY STOP YOURSELF?!
Nelson: He stopped himself because he has a little thing called "class" and "compassion!"
Heretic: I'll tell you why, Friends, because he saw a pathetic, whining sniveling wreck in front of him, and he suddeny lost his animal instincts and acted on one of society's poisonious lessons, MERCY. He stopped himself, because he felt BAD. Well Johnny, YOU CAN'T SHOW ANY MERCY IF YOU WANT TO SURVIVE! Wolves in the wild don't show mercy... they go for the juggular, and that's what YOU needed to do, Johnny! You betrayed your very NATURE, Johnny, and for what? FOR WHAT?
Nelson: This is unreal! He really expects people to jump through these ridiculous hoops for him?
Hart: They've been doing it, Joel, that's the problem!
Nelson: I disagree, Robbie. They haven't given him what he's wanted! Johnny Serious showed restraint last week!
Heretic: But my friends, there's another man out there who needs to embrace his true self. Josh Cantrell tried to IMPRESS me last week. He dominated an opponent in the ring for me, but felt REMORSE.. he APOLOGIZED! [laughs] HE APOLOGIZED! But tonight, I'm going to give Josh Cantrell another shot. Tonight, you will all see the REAL JOSH CANTRELL, becaue what I have planned..... what I have planned, my friends, will be the ultimate test. We will see what Josh Cantrell is MADE OF. And if he passes this test.... then he gets what he wants? Sound fair? I think so!
Nelson: A test? I can't even imagine what he'll try to put Josh Cantrell too!
Hart; I'm no Cantrell fan, but I don't even want to think about what Heretic's gonna try to make him do.
Heretic: Enjoy the show, my dear dear friends!
["Living in the sunlight, loving in the moonlight" plays and the crowd once again boos loudly as Heretic exits the ring.]
Nelson: Well, at least I made it through that one unscathed.
Hart: The night's still young!
Where Are You?
[Camera pans backstage to find "Hotshot" Chris Michaels walking through the hallways of the Air Canada Centre in apparent search for someone or something. After several moments of looking through doors and down hallways, Chris Michaels approaches several staff members]
Chris Michaels: Hey guys – none of you have seen Christian Roman tonight yet, have you?
[The men shake their heads "no" as Chris looks down at his feet and continues shuffling on, looking]
Nelson: Chris Michaels looking for Christian Roman? What for?
Hart: Roman's his watcher – I'm sure he's going to need some help tonight against the likes of Chazz Mendel, for sure!
Quarantine!
[Devon Dice is hobbling down the hallway towards the WGL locker room, looking much more active than he did last week.]
Dice: Thaddeus is going to be thrilled.
[Dice knocks and opens the door and gets one step inside. Thaddeus Walker and CB Fowler are seen covering their nose and mouth with their hands, grab surgeon masks and rubber gloves, and put them on.
Thaddeus: POLIO!!!!
Dice: Guys, come on. I don't have..
Walker: [muffled] Please step outside. You were to be kept in the infirmary, in isolation.
[Thaddeus pushes Dice outside the door and slams it shut.]
Dice: I'm not sick! Let me in, I have great news. I'm going to be okay in a few weeks.
Walker: Young gentleman...That's what they want you to think, before you know it, you'll be bedridden before sweet death takes you.
Dice: Just let me in, I DON'T HAVE POLIO!
[Dice tries the door but it only budges a little as Thaddeus and Fowler are obviously holding it shut.]
Dice: [straining] Let me in, Damnit!
Walker: NO! I don't know how to say it any more clearly. You are contagious and you are going to die! GET BACK TO QUARANTINE!
[Dice stops fighting the door and it slams closed. He begins back down the hallway when suddenly a butterfly net comes down over him, and two men in what appear to be deep sea diving suits and wearing white coats grab him and begin to drag him away. As they turn, the words "Home for the deathly ill" can be seen on the back of their white coats.]
Hart: Poor Dice! He needs to accept his fate.
Nelson: I don't really think he needs to be quarantined for a sprained knee..
Hart: A sprained knee? You heard Thaddeus, it's polio! In fact, we should probably clear the building!
Nelson: Well, it's time for our first match of the evening. The score is currently tied in this best of five series, at one win apiece!
[Mary-Joe comes out to the ring with a very upset look on her face.]
Nelson: This Chastity McGavin is quite impressive.
Hart: *Sigh... that is Mary-Joe Wolf, she is a supporter of both Diamond and McGavin and she sleeps with me.
Nelson: Don't you think she is a little out of your league?
Hart: Yes, and I love every minute of it. She is on her way over here... I am so excited.
[Mary-Joe picks up her headset and puts it around her head. She doesn't make any facial expressions and doesn't sit down. She doesn't even look Robbie Hart.]
Hart: Hey baby, how are you doing?
Mary-Joe: Not very well. I have a migrane, my two clients are tearing eachother apart and believe that I have something to do with it. I am not feeling well.
Hart: Why don't you take a seat, I always love it when you do commentary.
Mary-Joe: I'm not here to do commentary, I just have something I want to say to you.
Hart: I DO!
[Wolf looks disgusted.]
Mary-Joe: No, I'm here to say that we are finished. There is alot on my mind and besides, I got what I needed.
Hart: What you needed?
Mary-Joe: Yeah, I had needs that needed to be fulfilled and you helped me with that. I'll give you a call next year around this time if I need it again.
Hart: But... but...
Mary-Joe: Shut up, Hart!
[Mary-Joe puts down the headset and walks off leaving a shattered Robbie Hart. He just looks on as Nelson continues to have a goofy look on his face.]
Nelson: Well, she is cute... you guys should date.
Hart: That bitch!
Chastity McGavin vs. Jen Diamond
Round three out of a possible five in the best of five series
Round three out of a possible five in the best of five series
Dixon: The following contest is scheduled for one fall is the third in a series of five!
["Physical" by Nine Inch Nails starts up as Jen Diamond slowly makes her way to the ring. Every couple of seconds she grabs her back. As she slides into the ring, the fans cheer her on.]
Dixon: Introducing first... hailing from Boca Raton, Florida and weighing in at one hundred and sixty pounds: JEN DIAMOND!
Nelson: I grew up watching Jen Diamond and I've always had a crush on her.
Hart: Let me tell you something, don't crush on the talent, they'll just break your heart.
Nelson: Oh, it's not the end of the world.
[Diamond stands in the middle of the ring, preparing for a fight as "Into the Darkness" hits and a determined Chastity McGavin is on the stage looking intent on hurting Diamond once more. Before Dixon can make any sort of announcement, Chastity runs down to the ring and slides in. Jen intercepts her with a hurricanran.]
DING DING DING
Nelson: This one is starting out fast and furious for Chastity. Tonight just might be Jen Diamond's night to tie it up.
Hart: Not while she has that bad back which is a huge bullseye.
Nelson: Diamond without hesitation attacks with a triangle on McGavin. She knows if this one goes on long then SHE woud be taken out easily. Chastity fights it and gets a free arm and puts it on the rope. Diamond waits a few minutes before breaking the hold. She backs away and then dropkick a kneeling Chastity in the head.
Hart: But look at how much effect this is having on Chastity... she is still coming at her.
Nelson: But Diamond again up and gets Chastity in a head scissors submission. Chastity still refusing to tap, but this has to be wearing her out. Once again, Chastity grabs the ropes and Jen is forced to break the hold. The minute Chastity is back up Diamond throws her back down with a release german suplex! Diamond goes for the ankle this time!
Hart: Look at how sinister Mary-Joe looks on the sidelines. I wonder how many hearts she broke?
Nelson: Probably just yours! Chastity reverses the ankle lock into a full Boston Crab. THIS CANNOT BE GOOD FOR DIAMOND!
Hart: I would say this IS the end for her as we know it. You know what kind of damage that move does on a person back.
Nelson: Diamond cries out in pain as Chastity pulls her away from the ropes. Chastity pressing down on Diamond, but she is refusing to tap. Jen tries pulling not only her weight but Chastity's weight to the ropes. Once again, Chastity pulls Diamond backwards. Diamond continues to scream in pain as Chastity... SMILES?
Hart: You'd smile two if you were so close to winning a critically acclaimed best of five series.
[Chastity smirks as she releases the hold on her will.]
Nelson: Why did Chastity do that?
Hart: Beats me, probably a weird chick habit he learned from that awful woman who keeps her in her stable.
Nelson: Your opinion changed quickly. Chastity urging Diamond to try something. Jen charges and lands a facebuster on her enemy. She follows up with the springboard moonsault and a pin attempt.
ONE
TWO
HArt: Thank god!
Neson: Diamond backs up, waiting for Chastity to get to her feet. Diamond now with a roundhouse kick to Chastity's cranium. Jen Diamond awaits her next move, but Chastity right out of the gates with the EQUALIZER! This triangle choke, I believe, could be it.
Hart: No Joel, this IS IT!
[The ref lifts Jen's hand up once and it goes down. HE lifts it again, but it falls down once more. One last time and Diamond manages to keep it.]
Nelson: She keeps that last arm up and Blake makes them break the hold. But the minute the hold is broke Chastity locks in the Boston Crab once more. She might have gotten out of the equalizer, but who is to bet that she is going to have a little bit of a harder time with antoher Boston Crab. Diamond reaches for the ropes, but Chastity pulls her back. And again, but Chastity pulls her back by applying even more pressure. Diamod not refusing to quit.
Hart: But that is just going to screw her in round four.
Nelson: And Diamond makes a valiant effor to the ropes once more! Is she going to do it!
[Diamond reaches the rope by Mary-Joe quickly slaps it off. This gives Chastity leeway to pull Chastity further away.]
Nelson: WHAT WAS THAT?
Hart: That was a bitch doing what she does best: being a bitch.
Nelson: Mary-Joe just pushed off Diamonds arm from the ropes. Not biased my ass.
Hart: Yeah, I don't believe that anymore either.
[Thirty seconds after having to break away from the hold, Diamond starts to tap.]
Nelson: NO! Sadly this one is over.
DING DING DING
Nelson: The tally is two to one and Diamond must win next week to keep herself in the game. But the real story is that MAry-Joe Wolf just showed her true colors by knocking Diamond's arm off the ropes. This has to confirm the conspiracy.
HArt: Oh... you have no idea.
[Chastity, not with Mary-Joe, stands on the rampway with her arm up in the air. Meanwhile, Mary-Joe begins to tend to Diamond.]
Nelson: She just betrayed her client and now she is offering to help her? This girl is crazy!
Hart: YOu have no idea!
[When Diamond coms to she pushes MAry-Joe away accusing her of setting her up. Mary-Joe immediately steps otu of the ring while Jen Diamond screams at her from inside the ring. Mary-Joe just keeps mouthing "It wasn't me!" to her and "It was a misunderstanding."]
[Commercial Break]
Land of Confusion
[As we come back from a commercial break we see Raymond Jacobson standing out in the ring dressed in his ring gear. As he stands there we listen to the roar of the crowd before we begin to hear his voice.]
Jacobson: Listen up, I am out for the simple reason that I am a little confused in this whole US title situation. The first question that I have is how in the hell did JJ Carter get involved in this whole mess? First off Chandler, you are always saying that you are better than everyone else but you have yet to prove that, most of your wins come because of out side interference or because you cheat to win.
[We then begin to hear Lance and Robbie speak up.]
New PBP Guy: You know Jacobson has a point there Robbie.
Hart: Shut up, Jacobson is trying to start trouble again and you know it!
[Jacobson begins to speak once more as he leans over the ropes looking up the ramp way.]
Jacobson: Chandler, how about you put all your money where your mouth is and come out here and give me what you know I deserve, and that is a shot at the United States Championship. And you know you can't beat me clean Chandler, but if you really want to make it feel more like home for you Chandler you can invite your little boy friend J.J. Carter and I will beat both of you down.
[Jacobson stops talking as he waits for Chandler to come out. Instead, "Grasshopper" by Sander van Doorn plays over the arena and J.J. Carter comes out from backstage.]
Carter: Me? Friends with Chandler? Oh man, if Muslims could laugh I would right now. But seriously, you and I have the same goal. We both want to become the United States champion. Both of us want to topple Chandler and shatter his over-inflated ego.
[Carter pauses as he waits for Chandler to come out, but nothing happens.]
Carter: Do you see what he has done to us? He thinks we're idiots. He's got us pitted against each other for his amusement, so he doesn't have to fight either one of us. You are not my problem Ray. Did you see what I did at Driven last week? If I had a major issue with you, I would have attacked you and not him. Chandler has what I want, not you. But I am willing to go through both of you if I have to.
Voice: Hold on!
[Chandler rushes out with his title over his shoulder and holding the microphone. He stops at the rampway as both men look at him.]
Dalmon: Raymond... are you going to put up with that? Did you hear what he was saying...
[Jacobson cuts him off.]
Jacobson: Cut the crap Chandler, I'm not buying it anymore. You need to put the title on the line at some point.
[Chandler lights up like he has an idea.]
Dalmon: I got it, right here tonight, you two will face eachother...
[It is JJ's turn to cut him off.]
Carter: No, no, no... we already went down that route before.
[Chandler shrugs.]
Dalmon: Then I guess, I can't help you because there can only be one number contender...
["Crawling" plays and Tony Awesome struts out looking at all three men and then finally looks directly at Chandler.]
Awesome: You don't get to say who is the contender to your title, Chandler. That is not in your jurisdiction, it's in mine. As of right now, both JJ Carter and Raymond Jacobson are the number one contenders to the United States title.
[The crowd cheers as Jacobson and JJ look at eachother. Chandler looks very upset.]
Awesome: Normally, I'd say that you would be defending your title at To Hell and Back, but I REALLY want to see your plan backfire alot sooner. I tell you what, you guys get backstage, but on your wresting gear because later on tonight, we are going to have a triple threat match for the United States title.
[The fans cheer louder as Awesome makes his way back stage, trading a smirk with Chandler. Jacobson looks very pleased as Carter slides out of the ring and heads to the back.]
Hart: What an announcement!
Nelson: I'd say so, these three men will be facing off tonight for that belt the fuzzy one has over his shoulder.
Hart: You mean "The ChED?"
Nelson: No, I think I'll wait for commercial to do that.
Unpleasant reactions
[Backstage, the camera sneaks up on Mr. Rich and Evette who are talking. They are surrounded by the 4 INTERNS who act as a secret service force for the couple.]
Evette: Why am I being forced to defend the women's title. It's not fair. They are picking on me because I am a classy woman, not one of these skanky girls running around proclaiming to be women.
Mr. Rich: Relax! We will do what we do best. We will find out who the ref is for your match, throw some green down and watch the results go in your favor.
Evette: As much as I hate this nasty looking belt, I like knowing that I am the only true role model for every girl who always had a dream of being beautiful, rich, and skinny.
[Just as they are speaking, Jason Duran walks up to the couple with a mic.]
Duran: Mr. Rich. It was just announced that you would be facing Sean Pason at To Hell And Back. What's your feeling?
Mr. Rich: My feeling. I think it is foul that the brass of cWo would want to waste my talent against a low class hick like Sean Pason. First, what gives him the right to invade on my personal business. There I was last week, trying to have a heart to heart chat with my friend Mike Logan and the new couple, Barrett Hawk and Lana Lexington.
Duran: Chat? It was more like a one sided beatdown on Hawk and Lexington!
Mr. Rich: That is your perception of the occurence, and it does not matter. What does matter is that Pason came out and stuck his nose where it diddn't belong. And then to top it off, he had the unmitigated gaul to stare us down like we were beneath him. Pason has opened the door for some BAD INVESTMENTS Jason, and when he gets the class to face me alone, without Barrett Hawk, then he will no what I and my Interns are talking about!
Duran: And what abou....
Mr. Rich: No more what abouts. We are done talking to you Jason!
[Mr. Rich, Evette and the Interns walk away.]
Hart: Ha! Jason's back to what he does best, getting humiliated by the talent!
Nelson: It doesn't look like those two were too happy with their scheduled matches for the upcoming pay per view!
Hart: They don't have to be happy to win against inferior competition!
Captain Magnificent vs. Rick Steele
["Push it to the Limit" by Paul Englemann rips throughout the arena as the fans respond with a mixed reaction of cheers and jeers]
Hart: Aren't you excited, Joel? Your first night here in the cWo and you get to witness a legend in the making!
Nelson: I'm not gonna lie, Robbie, but I think Rick Steele is a bit past his prime to be considered a "legend in the making."
Hart: Rick Steele? What! Captain Magnificent!
Dixon: Making his way to the ring from New York City, New York and weighing in at an estimated two hundred and fifty pounds…CAAAAAPTAAAIN MAGNIFICENTTT!
[Red, white and blue pyrotechnics explode at the top of the ramp as Captain Magnificent appears, striking a pose for the few cameras that shutter in anticipation of his arrival. He quickly makes his way down the ramp, sliding into the ring awaiting his opponent]
Nelson: No words of wisdom from Captain Magnificent?
Hart: He's going to let his actions do the talking, Joel – you just wait and see! I know you're new around these parts, but Captain Magnificent is never one to disappoint!
["Room 409" by Bullet for My Valentine kicks off as the fans offer little to no reaction whatsoever. An out of shape Rick Steele appears at the top of the ramp, striking a fighting pose before jogging down the ramp]
Dixon: And his opponent! Making his way to the ring from Pittsburgh, Pennsylvania and weighing in at two hundred and forty-three pounds…RICCCKKK STEEEELEE!
[Steele jogs around the perimeter of the ring, eying Captain Magnificent the entire time before deciding to roll in. Aaron Blake calls for the bell as both men pace back and forth]
DING DING DING
Nelson: And we're off to the races here! Steele's in the ring and Captain Magnificent immediately begins to hammer away at him!
Hart: Take it easy over there, Tonto – don't use up all of your breath immediately! These are some of the tricks of the trade I can pass down to you through my tutelage!
Nelson: You just know how exciting this is for me, Robbie? Do you have any idea?
Hart: Uh, no, not really.
Nelson: Well, let me tell you –
[Captain Magnificent grabs hold of Rick Steele after pounding him with boots to the back. He drags him to his feet and shoots him into the ropes, but Steele ducks under a clothesline and charges towards the Caped Crusader on the turnaround, knocking him to the canvas with a quick knee his chestplate!]
Nelson: - and that was the first time I ever saw a cWo match!
Hart: Very invigorating stuff, Joel – but you're missing the grandeur of Captain Magnificent!
Nelson: Are you kidding, Robbie? It doesn't look like it's swinging his way right now!
Hart: He'll come around; don't you worry! He has a knack for these types of things!
Nelson: Steele's got a sleeper hold locker in tightly around the neck of Captain Magnificent right now, who's desperately trying to counter out of it – it also looks as if Rick Steele is in the mindset of unmasking cWo's superhero!
Hart: It'll never happen!
Nelson: How can you be so sure?
Hart: You just develop these instincts after a while, Tonto – you will eventually!
[Steele maniacally tangles at the back of Captain Magnificent's mask, leading the Caped Crusader to an advantage, elbowing Rick Steele in the midsection, spinning him around and dropping him to the canvas with a quick DDT! Captain Magnificent sprints off the ropes and delivers a BIG elbow to the sternum of the fallen Rick Steele as well!]
Nelson: And it looks like Captain Magnificent's trying to use the element of surprise to his advantage – he's going for the quick cover here!
ONE
TWO
NO!
Nelson: An almost on that one! And that seems to have summed up Captain Magnificent's "legendary" career in the cWo thus far, eh, Robbie?
Hart: Don't think you know more than I do just because you went to some hot shot Ivy League school, Tonto!
Nelson: Will you stop calling me Tonto already? What does that even mean?
Hart: Ha! That shows your age! He's the Lone Ranger's sidekick! And I, therefore, am the Lone Ranger!
Nelson: Who's the Lone Ranger?
Hart: Are you kidding me!
Nelson: Anyway – Captain Magnificent's working Rick Steele in the corner, driving his shoulder into the midsection of his adversary and changing it up every now and then with a few quick forearms to the head.
Hart: I still can't believe you don't know who the Lone Ranger is – am I that old?
Nelson: No; just misinformed about our generation!
Hart: And here I was thinking I was hip – now I'm the old geyser! I'm the Lance Wilden now!
[Captain Magnificent raises his arm to the fans, but Rick Steele uses that pause to his advantage, beginning to drive forearms into the chest of Captain Magnificent. Unfortunately for him, that maneuver is immediately countered, as Captain Magnificent headbutts Rick Steele, knocking him down to the canvas on the seat of his pants!]
Nelson: Captain Magnificent showing who's in charge right now!
Hart: Look at that comeback – weeks ago this match would be over if Rick Steele gained the upper hand like that; now we've got a fighter!
Nelson: And Captain Magnificent's gonna further cement that idea – he drags Rick Steele out of the corner and Irish whips him into the ropes, taking him down with a BIG shoulder block! He's hooking the leg!
ONE
TWO
NO!
Hart: Rick Steele – are you serious right now?
Nelson: He's showing quite a bit of life for someone who's a bit out of shape and hasn't seen a cWo ring in some time.
Hart: I guess those instructional self-defense videos never paid the dividends he was hoping for!
Nelson: You know, we actually watched those back in Princeton –
Hart: To find out how to protect yourself from an enormous amount of homework? Or from an attractive girl who's coming on to you at a bar?
Nelson: Erm, not exactly.
Hart: Oh no? I just assumed that all of you eggheads were alike!
[Captain Magnificent, frustrated at his performance, pulls Rick Steele to his feet and shoots him into the ropes one more time. Steele ducks under a clothesline and then drops an axe handle smash on the back of Captain Magnificent, who was waiting patiently for a back body drop!]
Nelson: Boy, did he telegraph that one!
Hart: He's still learning, Joel – get with the program! He's out fighting crime every night, when do you expect him to work on his wrestling maneuvers?
Nelson: You've been making the same old excuse for him every week since he's arrived here, Robbie! How can you say that?
Hart: Because he is, damnit! He's still learning!
Nelson: He's learning the hard way now though, that's for certain. Rick Steele is in control now and drops Captain Magnificent to the canvas with a snap mare – and now he's locked in a leg scissors move around the neck of Captain Magnificent!
Hart: Don't female wrestlers generally use this?
Nelson: Anything to get the job done, I'm sure, Robbie! You can't interject!
Hart: All I'm saying is that I'd prefer a female doing it than an overweight Rick Steele!
[Captain Magnificent struggles momentarily, biding his time in figuring out how to release himself from this hold. After a few seconds, however, he begins to fade as Rick Steele can be seen tightening his legs around the neck of Captain Magnificent]
Nelson: This doesn't look good for your superhero, Robbie!
Hart: You just wait and see; there's always a sequel!
Nelson: Aaron Blake is getting involved now – he's checking out Captain Magnificent; I think he's trying to make sure if he's still alive or not!
Hart: What a hardship that would be to bear if he passed in this very ring!
Nelson: That was a bit poetic and elegiac, Robbie.
Hart: That's what times like these call for!
Nelson: This isn't looking too good for Captain Magnificent, as Rick Steele continues his dominance with a leg scissors clamp over the Caped Crusader's neck, sucking the life out of him before our very eyes!
Hart: He's fighting back though, look at him flail his arms around, Joel – his only hope is managing to swing and get to that rope on his left side – it looks like he's just a bit out of reach!
Nelson: Right you are; Captain Magnificent seems to have figured this out all on his own as well – he's desperately trying to make his way over to that bottom rope on his left side! How embarrassing would it be for this man if he tapped out to Rick Steele here right now, Robbie?
Hart: He'd survive – I see Captain Magnificent as someone that isn't bothered by what people say about him. Otherwise, how could he do what he does consistently!
Nelson: And what is that? Perform on a low level?
Hart: No! Fight crime! Come on!
[Captain Magnificent struggles against this relentless onslaught of Rick Steele's legs, swinging his body to the left side and reaching out, grasping the rope at the very last second on the turnaround as Aaron Blake gets involved!]
Nelson: He caught a break there!
Hart: What break? He swung and reached out – you're not giving the man any credit!
Nelson: Has he deserved any yet? I didn't think so! I'll give him this though; Captain Magnificent's back on his feet already and trading blows with Rick Steele!
Hart: Look at him go!
Nelson: Captain Magnificent grabs the upper hand, backing Steele into the ropes! He's pounding away at him right now – and now he clotheslines Rick Steele over the top and on to the apron! But wait – he thinks he's knocked him out of the ring!
Hart: Turn around you fool!
[Captain Magnificent turns and celebrates at his apparent ability to knock Rick Steele out of the ring. Unbeknownst to him, Steele gathers himself on the apron, grabbing Captain Magnificent as he turns around and slamming his head into the turnbuckle!]
Nelson: Ever the showboater!
Hart: What can you say? He's impressed with what he can do and the leaps and strides he's made!
Nelson: And they're costing him dearly thus far in this match; Steele climbs back into the ring as Captain Magnificent holds his face – now Steele's in control with a giant European uppercut that sends the apparent superhero backwards!
Hart: What do you mean apparent? Didn't you see those promotions about him when he was just starting out in the cWo?
Nelson: They were fake! We saw a car door blow away in the wind!
Hart: That must have been a pretty big gust of wind – it was hurricane season, you know!
[Rick Steele grabs Captain Magnificent around the waistline and lifts him into the air, bringing him down to the canvas with a vertical suplex, and then rolling over for the cover!]
ONE
TWO
NO!
Nelson: A close call there for Captain Magnificent! Rick Steele is definitely making him work for a victory, that's for certain!
Hart: He's bound to come around!
Nelson: You've been saying that since the beginning of this match, Robbie, and I haven't seen anything to convince me otherwise just yet!
Hart: Oh no – what is this! That dastardly fiend!
Nelson: Well, it seems as if the Mad Cow is out here now to take a closer look at this match!
Hart: I don't like the looks of this one bit!
[The Mad Cow appears at the top of the ramp to a trickling amount of boos as Rick Steele drops Captain Magnificent with a snap suplex. Rick Steele waves towards his direction as Aaron Blake gets in the middle, waving his hands at the Mad Cow]
Nelson: Well, it seems as if the Mad Cow is now just biding his time – I'm sure waiting for the perfect moment to strike!
Hart: See what I mean! Captain Magnificent constantly has to adhere to these issues day after day in his life!
Nelson: But hang on a second – Rick Steele isn't paying attention! He was still trying to garner the Mad Cow's attention! Now him and Captain Magnificent are trading blows once more!
Hart: He's got this one in the bag!
Nelson: Captain Magnificent ducks under a clothesline and boots Rick Steele in the midsection, lifting him into the air into an overhead press – and THAT'S MAGNIFICENT!
Hart: He's got this under wraps! That cutter almost took Rick Steele's head off!
Nelson: Captain Magnificent hooks the leg, and it looks like you can chalk this one up to a distraction caused by the Mad Cow!
ONE
TWO
THREE!
DING DING DING
Dixon: Here is your winner…CAAAPTAAAIN MAGNIFICENTTT!
[As Captain Magnificent celebrates, he spots the Mad Cow lurking around the ring. He begins to exit the ring, backpedaling his way up the ramp with his arm outstretched, motioning that towards the Mad Cow and mouthing "You're Next!"]
Nelson: Captain Magnificent picks up the victory here, but it looks as if he's high-tailing it without coming after the Mad Cow!
Hart: It's only a matter of time; both of these men know that they're going at it in two weeks, Joel! Captain Magnificent wants to unmask and finally defeat the Mad Cow in front of a larger audience, you know!
Nelson: Hang on a second – what is this!
[Mad Cow enters the ring now as Rick Steele stands to his feet; both men begin to argue as Rick Steele is seen saying "Where's my money?" Suddenly, a block of cheese explodes over the head of Rick Steele, rendering him unconscious!]
Nelson: And so ends the strange partnership of Rick Steele and the Mad Cow! Our thoughts have finally been confirmed, that Rick Steele was merely lured out for financial reasons.
Hart: That's what happens when you don't pay the bills, Joel – you turn to a life of crime!
Nelson: Now he can go back his normal life of kicking people in the family jewels, huh?
Hart: You obviously didn't major in comedy.
The Bastard Contemplates His Next Motive
[The cameras go backstage where we see Jacob "The Bastard" Baxter sitting backstage, seemingly lost in thought. He wears his leather jacket over a t-shirt and some jeans. Tiffany Tolberg walks into frame with a microphone in hand. Baxter still doesn't budge and Tiffany looks a little surprised. She tilts her head into Baxter's eyeline]
Tiffany Tolberg: Excuse me, Mr. Baxter?
[Slowly his eyes shift towards Tiffany, and in another moment the rest of his head turn. He replies back, his voice a little quieter than usual, but still stern and rough]
Jacob Baxter: Yeah?
[Tiffany hesitantly responds]
Tolberg: We haven't seen you since Eye of the Storm. What have your whereabouts been since then? What are your thoughts on the current state of the cWo?
Baxter: Tiffany, where I've been these past few weeks pale in comparison to where I came from at Eye of the Storm. Even the most vicious of beasts need time to heal their wounds. What I received that night was brutal, violent, and quite bloody…just bloody. Even a tough bloke like myself needed time to think over that kind of destruction. But what matters is I'm back and ready once again.
[He turns his eyes away from Tiffany and off into the distance. Tiffany still looking a little perplexed, follows up with another question]
Tolberg: And ready for what exactly? You said yourself that The Beast always points out his next prey. Who's next for you? Are you going back after Josh Cantrell? Seeking your US title back from Chandler Edsel Dalmon? Maybe even going after Heretic?
[The mere mention of the name "Heretic" has Baxter cock his head back and squint his eyes, thinking to himself before he responds]
Baxter: Heretic is a sick wanker, and I think he did enough to get myself and Cantrell to destroy each other at Eye of the storm. I actually feel a little offended at how much I was manipulated by him. But going after him myself would be stupid. You know, I was there listening to Johnny Serious earlier tonight. He's a tough bloke. Tough enough where I still don't regret what I've done to him. He seems to be fine again no time. Unlike that ponce Christian Roman, Serious is a man who I know and have traded blows with. Plus he's not a drunk Irish twat! If he were leading a cause to stop someone like Heretic…it may just give me a reason to give a damn about something. Afterall, I can't do what I need to around here with Heretic trying to turn everyone into his puppets…
[Tiffany looks a little shocked at Baxter's reply.]
Tolberg: So, does this mean you're going to align with Johnny Serious?
[Baxter looks back with a shocked expression]
Baxter: Don't get ahead of yourself yet, Tiffany.
[Baxter gets up and begins to walk off, leaving Tiffany Tolberg hanging at the scene. She just shrugs as the cameras fade to black.]
[Commercial break]
Strange bedfellows
[The scene opens up in a locker room focusing on Chandler. He is looking at something very panicked. He holds his U.S title close to his chest.]
Dalmon: Listen, I know you aren't the good samaritan type... but I didn't know who else to go too. Dice is out on injury, Xyce-Pac has gone into hibernation and Thaddeus is diseased.
[Chandler at the title on his shoulder.]
Dalmon: There are two men, albeit inferior men, after my title and I need an insurance policy. You my friend have proven to be dangerous and quite amazing in the ring. I think you would be the perfect man to, as the children would say "Watch my back." Me and you both know that having Jacobson or JJ Carter with the title will lead to dark days.
[He shines his belt again and smiles at the mystery gentlemen.]
Dalmon: And you know what they say: If you scratch my back, I'll scratch yours. There MIGHT even be a title shot in it for you.
[He backs away somewhat intimidated.]
Dalmon: Just think about it.
[The camera then cuts off from this scene.]
Hart: Wait, who was he talking to?
Nelson: I know just as much as you do.
Hart: What? You're NEW, you don't know half as much as I do!
Nelson: I meant about what we just saw, Robbie. But it seems to me like the WGL has fallen apart at the seems.
Hart: Never! The WGL is strong! No matter what they say!
Nelson: Well, ladies and gentlemen, we heard the announcement earlier that Lana Lexington would be facing Evette for the world title at To Hell and Back..
Hart: I like Tony Awesome, but this is just pure nepotism!
Nelson: Nice big word, Robbie. Whether you agree with her getting the shot or not, she's in action in our next match, right now!
Lana Lexington vs. Mad Maddie
["Right of Way" by Ferry Cortsen plays from the PA system as Mad Maddie comes out to a mixed reaction]
DING DING DING
Dixon: This match is set for one fall! First, making her way down the aisle from Waterbury, Connecticut…MAD MADDIE!
[Maddie walks her way down the aisle and slides into the ring]
Nelson: Mad Maddie is someone definitely still trying to find her place after the Eye of the Storm fallout. I haven't had a chance to meet her yet, but something tells me she's not much of a people person.
Hart: She's loud, she's crude, and she loves to cuss like a sailor. What are you talking about? She's a social butterfly.
[As Maddie's music fades, there's a short lull of silence before a strobe light flashes from the entrance way as the intro to Justice's "Genesis" hits. As the song kicks in, Lana Lexington bursts out from the entrance way jumping up and down, looking excited and ready for her match. She is welcomed by cheers from the fans and acknowledges them with a wave and smile as she makes her way to the ring.]
Dixon: And her opponent, from Boston, Massachusetts…LANA LEXINGTON!
Nelson: Now this girl has "rookie sensation" written all over her. She's been on a slow burning path since getting her, but her stock's definitely been rising.
Hart: I don't know how smart of a move it was to get involved in any business regarding Mr. Rich, Mike Logan, and Nick Dangerous. She should stick to her battles with Evette and stay out of Barrett Hawk's business if you ask me.
Nelson: This girl screams high impact and high risk in and out of the ring. Sometimes you need to take those chances to get somewhere, Robbie.
[Lana climbs on to the apron and faces the crowd with her back to the ropes. She outstretches her arms and does a backflip into the ring and lands in a pose with her feet crossed and her arms outstretched. The fans cheer as she flashes another smile as the music fades]
Nelson: Tony Awesome granted Lana a Womens Title shot earlier tonight for Hell and Back Robbie, so she's gonna have to make sure that she dedicates tonight to proving that she deserves it and it's not a case of nepotism.
DING DING DING
[The two women pace around each other in the ring. Lana charges and gets Maddie in a headlock. She completes a headlock takedown, but Maddie pushes her off. The two women get back on their feet and charge at each other. Lana knocks Maddie down with a shoulder block. Maddie gets back up but is knocked over with yet another shoulder block. Maddie gets back up once again and this time hits a forearm on Lana Lexington! Lana fires back with a shot of her own. The two ladies continue to trade blows, until Lana blocks one of Maddie's shots and comes back with a Chick Kick! Knocking Maddie to the mat!]
Nelson: And a beautiful textbook roundhouse kick, by Lana Lexington! The girl has some educated feet on her.
Hart: Is that your thing?
Nelson: What?
Hart: Got a foot thing, huh?
Nelson: I'm simply analyzing Lana's great footwork.
Hart: Sicko.
[Lana in the corner, launches herself with a split-legged moonsault, hitting it perfect on Maddie. She covers]
ONE
TWO
Nelson: Maddie kicks out, that combo simply not enough yet to overwhelm her.
Hart: Maybe she should've put the boots to her more, eh?
Nelson: Will you stop?
[Maddie getting to her feet as Lana crouches and waits. She charges at Maddie, but Maddie drives a foot into Lana's midsection. Maddie lands a DDT on Lana. Lana though gets right back up to her feet and dropkick's Maddie back into the corner. Lana goes for a back handspring elbow, but stops short as Maddie rolls out of the way!]
Nelson: These women both moving quick on her feet! Lana learning to make a quick stop as Maddie gets out before damage could be done!
Hart: She's gotta learn from her mistakes some time, I guess.
[Maddie grabs Lana's arm and Irish whips her into the corner. Lana hits the corner chest first! Maddie follows up with a belly to back suplex and bridges for a pin]
ONE
TWO
Nelson: And Lana Lexington rolls out of that one.
[Both women hop back onto their feet at almost the same time. Lana hits another Chick Kick, then takes Maddie down with a snapmare! She kicks Maddie square in the back and follows up with a neck snap! She finishes off the combo with a standing moonsault! She covers]
ONE
TWO
THR
Nelson: EL-OH-EL! What an onslaught by Lana, but still can't keep Maddie down!
Hart: I don't really get what's so funny about that combo.
[Lana is up and planning her next move. She waves her hand at Maddie, telling her to "bring it". Maddie fights to her feet not looking too happy. Lana goes after Maddie, but Maddie surprises Lana with a drop toe-hold!]
Hart: It looks like Lana's getting a little cocky!
Nelson: Cockiness and confidence are two separate things, Robbie. She's just a young, ambitious girl happy to be on a roll!
[Lana gets back up as Maddie smiles. Lana charges at Maddie again and Maddie ducks and pushes Lana into the ropes. Lana bounces back and Maddie grabs her in position for a reverse suplex! She lifts Lana up, but shifts momentum and lands behind Maddie.]
Nelson: Excellent reversal! She turns in into a Lexicution! She hits it! She pins!
ONE
TWO
THREE
DING DING DING
Dixon: Here is your winner. LANA LEXINGTON!
Hart: The rookie gets lucky again!
Nelson: That's far from luck. She might've had some over-confidence at times, but she knew what she was doing in there and looked more comfortable than ever, definitely a performance worthy of a chance against Evette for the gold!
[Lana is celebrating her win when Pink Floyd's "Money" hits the PA system. Mr Rich, Evette and Mike Logan all make their way out towards the ring.]
Nelson: And cWo fans most likely expected these three to come out together just as much as they were dreading it.
Hart: What new lows could they reach this week?
Nelson: I don't think these three could sink any lower. After the matches Tony Awesome's announced for these three I wouldn't be surprised if they're out here just to gain some momentum heading into the pay per view To Hell and Back in little over a week.
[Evette, with the cWo Womens Title around her waist and a mic in hand begins to speak as the three of them face Lana Lexington in the ring.]
Evette: Oh Lana...congratulations on your little victory tonight. You must be real proud of yourself scoring a useless victory over poor little Maddie. And to hear all of this crowd support for you is overwhelming. I guess these un-educated Canadians do not have an idea about good family values. Otherwise, they would never support a homewrecker such as yourself.
Hart: An Obvious reference to Lana's affair with Barrett Hawk!
Nelson: Alleged affair.
Evette: You must think your something special to get yourself a shot at my lovely belt. In my opinion, only a REAL LADY deserves a shot at my title. The kind of lady who doesn't open up her legs for just any and every man in this arena. The kind of lady who saves herself for marriage, which obviously, you have not! Look at you. You're ugly. You have no sense of style. You're hair is disgusting. What makes you think you are a champion of all women? Lana, I outclassed you at EYE OF THE STORM and I WILL DO IT AGAIN IF I HAVE TO!
[Suddenly, Mike Logan is handed the microphone as he looks out at the crowd wearing a Montreal Canadiens jersey to further incense the hometown crowd as they start booing loudly and chanting "LO-GAN SUCKS!".]
Logan: You know, I really expected a nice welcome home party from my fellow Canadians, with women galore, but the problem is there's too many dykes in this town!
Nelson: Come on! Can we please cut his microphone?
Logan: But that's not what I'm here for. I'm here to address one, Lana Lexington. You know, sweet-cheeks, it takes a really bad girl to take advantage of Barrett Hawk after all that "Hop-Along" has been through... and you know what? I actually kind of like it! You see, I'll admit that when I'm with Mr. Rich and Evette, going from place to place, I get a bit jealous that Mr. Rich has someone as beautiful as Evette by his side.
Hart: Wow, he sounds so sincere tonight.
Nelson: Oh, he's as sincere as a politician!
Logan: Anyway, it makes me wish I could find a girl with as much class, and Lana, while you're not quite as classy, not quite as attractive, might not be the brightest bulb in the box, but you're definitely tough and I'm wanting to make a good girl out of you. So I suggest you forget all about that hay-seed by kissing "The Sexual Intellectual" himself right on the lips.
Nelson: Look at Lana, she wants nothing to do with this.
Hart: I'm not so sure she has a choice.
Nelson: Wait a minute! Mr. Rich keeping Lana put by the arms! This is just sick. Come on guys you're better than this!
Hart: Do you know who you're talking about here?
[Rich, Logan and Evette share a laugh while Logan looks deep into Lana's eyes as he begins to close in.]
Hart: Looks like Lana's about to get a kiss from...wait a minute!
Nelson: Barrett Hawk coming to make the save! Armed with his rope and cowbell!
[Barrett Hawk enters the ring swinging his rope, Evette backs into the corner as Rich tosses Lana Lexington aside, Mike Logan with not much of an option then charges after Hawk as referee Aaron Blake who's still around from Lana's match shouts at everyone involved to restore some order.]
Nelson: And a cowbell to the head of Mike Logan!
[Fans erupt as Logan gets up off the mat and receives another shot from Hawk.]
Nelson: Hawk giving Mike Logan a preview of what's to come at Hell and Back!
[As Logan hits the mat Barrett ties a quick knot around Logan's ankles and steps on it to keep Logan in one spot as he looks to Mr. Rich.]
Hart: He just tied Logan up!
Nelson: Mr. Rich doesn't look to be in a fighting mood tonight-and lookout!
Hart: I was wondering where those interns are!
[Barrett lays on the mat after being taken down by Rich's four interns, who pummel on Barrett's back, while Logan frees himself from the rope. Logan picks up the rope as he brings himself to his feet, and is seen making an order to the interns, when in a familiar sight the interns hold Hawk down by his arms and legs again.]
Nelson: No not this again..
[Logan starts swinging the cowbell as he's heard saying "you never learn Hayseed!" To the fans pleasure Sean Pason comes out from the entrance way in a rush.]
Nelson: Hold on a minute! Sean Pason is charging into the frey just like last week!
Hart: This guy, what can I say!
[Pason hurries to the ring as everybody scurries outside of it, except for Pason, armed with Barrett's cowbell and rope.]
Hart: What's Mike Logan gonna do?
Nelson: Looks like he's gonna try going toe to toe with Pason, albeit with a weapon.
Mike Logan vs. Sean Pason
DING DING DING
Nelson: Aaron Blake just had enough and has called for the bell! Looks like we're gonna get right into the action with Pason taking on Logan!
Hart: Logan still has that cowbell! He might get disqualified right out of the gate!
Nelson: Pason's not gonna have that, however, as he just nails Logan with several elbow strikes to the face and just keeps pummeling him now with punches... and Logan's crawling to the corner with his tail between his legs!
[Aaron Blake kicks the cowbell and rope out of the ring as the battle ensues.]
Nelson: Sounds like these people could care less about Mike Logan. Pason now follows up with a Spinebuster Slam and hits some more punches to Logan, but again he crawls away.
Hart: Logan's getting brutalized here. He always seems so surprised that there's always someone who wants to beat him black and blue.
Nelson: Pason goes for a charge toward Logan, but "The Canadian Gigolo" runs him into the turnbuckles and now is taking this opportunity to get a few stomps in on Pason's chest!
Hart: And just like that, Mike Logan's back in the ball-game!
Nelson: Logan now stopping to shake his hips at Lana Lexington and he blows her a kiss in an absolutely disgusting display of chauvanism... BUT PASON'S UP RIGHT BEHIND HIM!
Hart: Turn around Mike, turn around!
[Pason goes for his now infamous roundhouse kick, but Logan finds the wherewithal to fall backwards and roll out of the ring.]
Nelson: Logan just saved himself from a surefire concussion.
[Logan looks at the interns, as he points at Pason, and backhands the palm of his hand three times, gesturing to them to take action, as the interns on instinct enter the ring.]
Nelson: You can't be serious!
[The interns all enter the ring as Pason sweeps them on the back with low kicks as they approach him.]
DING DING DING
Nelson: Logan just threw this match out the window!
[As Pason defends himself against the interns, Barrett grabs his cowbell and rope again as he decks two them with his cowbell.]
Nelson: Well it looks like this match has just transformed into mayhem Robbie!
[The fans go wild as Mr. Rich and Logan re-enter the ring, Lana Lexington joins the action as she leaps towards Logan and tosses him outside of the ring, under the ropes with a hurricanranna.]
Nelson: Even Lana Lexington has joined the fight!
[Barrett knocks down Mr. Rich with a blow from the cowbell, as the ring is cleared all except for Pason, Barrett, Lana and the two interns.]
Nelson: Pason and Hawk ridding the ring of the final two interns and it looks like that proverbial light at the end of the tunnel is that much more clear with help of Lana Lexington, Barrett Hawk and Sean Pason!
[As Rich, Evette, and Logan try to make their exit up the ramp, Lana and Barrett make chase, as Pason keeps an eye around the ring on the interns.]
Nelson: Lana and Barrett just do not wanna wait for Hell and Back!
[As Logan, Rich and Evette are out of sight, and Barrett and Lana are almost gone as well, Nick emerges from the entrance way, walking a slow controlled pace down to the ring.]
Hart: It's Nick Dangerous!
Nelson: Oh no...
[Pason's attention is immediately brought to Nick Dangerous, as Nick comes down, scowling at the sight of Pason as he draws in.]
Nelson: Maybe Nick Dangerous should be worried about the more confident by the minute HotShot Chris Michaels!
Hart: It was Sean Pason who knocked Nick Dangerous out cold two weeks ago Joel, taking focus off of him to a man he's beaten twice now would be a tough feat for that man right there.
Nelson: Well Pason just went from one fight to another and he's not backing down! He wants to fight Nick Dangerous!
Hart: He's crazy I'm telling you.
[Nick Dangerous enters the ring, when suddenly the interns re-enter the ring.]
Nelson: Wait a minute!
[Attracting both their attention Nick Dangerous and Sean Pason both make advances on the interns, immediately prompting them to scurry back out of the ring.]
Nelson: Looks like Dangerous and Pason wanna keep this one on one!
Hart: Here we go!
[Pason is the first to act after the interns leave, taking Nick down with a double leg takedown.]
Nelson: Pason takes Dangerous down!
[Pason vyes for a right or left hook, looking to be picking his spots but Nick squirms too frantically for Pason to find the opportunity.]
Nelson: The action's been nonstop tonight on Driven folks!
[Nick takes advantage of Pason's indecision and rolls around on the mat, as Nick mounts over top of Pason now and tries to lock a cross armbar.]
Nelson: Dangerous trying to break Pason's arm! Looks like this is gonna have to be settled some other day!
[Officials quickly scurry in the ring and break the fight up, five staff members help Pason back up and into the corner while four do the same for Dangerous in the opposite corner.]
Nelson: Officials in the ring breaking this up.
Hart: In my opinion these guys should have intervened the second Mr. Rich and Evette showed their faces here tonight.
Nelson: I wouldn't be surprised if Awesome's been secretly hoping guys like Mr. Rich and Logan would get what's been brought to them tonight, but this is getting a bit too out of control-and look out they're going at it again!
[Dangerous and Pason both escape the clutches of the officials as Pason and Dangerous exchange forearms in a quick rush of offense before the officials grab the two men and again restrain them.]
Nelson: But it's short lived.
Hart: How are they gonna keep these two away from each other for the rest of the night?
Nelson: I don't know Robbie, but I'm being told that we're gonna go for a break to try and give them the time to do so. We'll be back folks...wow..
[Commercial break.]
Team Meeting
[Most of the cWo wrestlers are standing backstage in the locker room. Johnny Serious walks in front of everyone wearing his WE ARE SERIOUSLY cWo!]
Johnny Serious: Listen guys. Over the past several weeks, the cWo has gone down a SERIOUSLY disturbing, dark path. We have all made choices that we can never take back. We have done things to each other that go beyond the call of professional wrestling. We lost one of the best men in cWo, Lance Wilden, for who knows how long. We have been asked to do things that go against our morality. It is no coincedence that it all stems from HERETIC. He has disgraced the history of the cWo and the history of the World Championship, but more importantly, he has played us all against each other and those who he has yet to touch, be warned, you will be played!
Tonight, I am asking all of you to come and take a SERIOUS stand! Because in order to restore the cWo back to it's better days, it needs to be ALL against ONE! This every man for themselves bit just isn't working. One man can not save the cWo, but ALL of us CAN! HOW? We do not give into HERETIC's games. We do not let him get into our heads.
I know we all don't get along and I know we all have our issues against each other, but there comes a time when we all need to put that all aside for the better good of the cWo. BECAUSE WE ARE cWo!!!!!!
So....who is with me????
[Serious stands there as all of the wrestlers just look around, and then one by one, begin to file out of the locker room]
Hart: Ha! Some savior he is!
Nelson: You've got to credit him for trying, Robbie.
Hart: It's useless, Joel. We've seen this over the last few months, nobody wants anything to do with Heretic! Roman couldn't rally the troops, neither can Serious!
Nelson: Well, someone's going to have to eventually!
US Title Match
Raymond Jacobson vs. JJ Carter vs. Chandler Edsel Dalmon ( c )
Raymond Jacobson vs. JJ Carter vs. Chandler Edsel Dalmon ( c )
["Murder was the case" by Snoop Dogg begins to play. The crowd cheers as JJ Carter steps out from behind the entrance curtain.
Nelson: It's time for the match Tony Awesome announced tonight, a triple threat for the United States title!
Hart: Good! I'm getting sick of these guys… it's time for Chandler to finish them off.
Nelson: Remember that Chandler won't have to get pinned to lose that cherished title of his.
[The lights flicker on and off a couple of times before cutting to complete black. The screen then flashes the words "Your New Drug Of Choice". We then begin to hear the sounds of "Image Of The Invisible" by Thrice. The lights begin to flash with a red tint to the beat of the song. Raymond then walks out on to the stage wearing his black pleather tights with a red RJ logo on both sides, and his black wrestling boots. He smirks as we get a good view of his face. Dark sunglasses cover his eyes as he looks into the camera. He then continues to walk down the ramp. As he reaches the ring he rolls under the ropes and gets to his feet before walking to the center of the ropes and climbing up on to the second rope raising both hands into the air above his head. We then await the introduction.]
Nelson: Raymond and JJ have had an interesting couple of weeks having had to deal with Chandler's fiddling.
Hart: It's their fault for going after a title that they don't deserve. It can be argued that both men deserve the title more than the ChED.
Nelson: Speaking of which, here he comes.
["Welcome to the Jungle" by Dick Cheese plays as Chandler comes pacing out, looking at both men in the ring waiting for him.]
Nelson: You have to wonder who Chandler's insurance is and if it will keep him from losing his title tonight, because odds say that he isn't leaving here with the title.
Hart: Odds don't mean anything.
[Chandler sets his belt aside and the minute he gets in the ring, both Jacobson and JJ Carter start pounding on him.]
DING DING DING
Hart: That is not fair.
Nelson: It seems like his plan HAS indeed backfired on him because he is the one laying on the mat. Both men irish whip Chandler into the turnbuckle. Jacobson then irish whips JJ towards Chandler Dalmon and hits him with an elbow to the head. Raymond Jacobson then charges and hits a splash onto Chandler. JJ and Raymond grab Chandler by the hair and bulldogs him onto the mat.
Hart: When did this become a handicap match?
Nelson: When Chandler tried playing everyone for fools. Jacobson picks up Chandler and with an assist from Carter hits a hook DDT. JJ follows up with a leg drop to the back of Chandler's head.
Hart: When did these guys become such good friends?
Nelson: I just think they want Chandler out of this so someone deserving gets to hold the title. Jacobson now resting Chandler on his shoulders AND JJ CARTER RUNS TO THE ROPES AND HITS A SPRINGBOARD DOOMSDAY DEVICE! Chandler is on the mat now and Carter immediately goes for the pin.
ONE
TWO
[Raymond pulls JJ off and quickly goes for the pin himself.]
ONE
TWO
[JJ then pulls him off as well. The two stare at eachother and then shrug at eachother. The start trading back and forth blows with eachother.]
Nelson: And it looks like this truce has ended, at least for now. JJ with a side suplex. He pulls Jacobson back up, but Jacobson with an uppercut followed by a step up enziguri. JJ back up and dodges a koppou kick and hits a mule kick. Jacobson lays between the two ropes and Carter bounces off the otherside and jumps onto his back knocking him down. Carter walks back just in time to hear "because the Superkick is available NOW!" and gets hit by of all things a superkick by Chandler.
Hart: The resourceful Chandler makes the pin.
ONE
TWO
Nelson: Jacobson breaks it up and pulls up Chandler for a guillotine backbreaker. He picks up Chandler again and is calling for the RJA... WAIT!
[Suddenly, Christiano Drago slides into the ring with a steel chair. He slams it over Jacobson's head. Raymond drops Chandler as he drops to the ground. Blake calls for the bell.]
DING DING DING
Nelson: NO WAY! Christiano Drago must be Chandler's insurance policy!
Hart: This is excellent!
[When JJ gets up, Christiano slams the chair over his head. Chandler slides out of the ring and grabs the title and pulls Jacobson up and slams it back over his head.]
DING DING DING
Nelson: This is out of control as Christiano slams the chair over JJ again! This is horrible!
Hart: Once again, Chandler defends his title.
Nelson: By underhanded tactics! And it looks like this time he recruited Christiano Drago... which isn't that much of a surprise.
[Chandler holds the title up high as Drago stands in the middle of the ring with the chair. Chandler puts his arm around Drago.]
Nelson: This is so wrong. Look at these two men celebrating in the ring. They destroyed a really good match.
Hart: No, they saved us from the crappiness that is JJ Carter as champion.
[Once Chandler turns around Drago slams the chair over his head as well.]
Nelson: DRAGO TURNS ON CHANDLER... I guess that isn't a surprise either though.
Hart: NO, THAT IS NOT RIGHT! How could Christiano do this?
Nelson: How could he not? This gives him automatic rep backstage!
[Drago picks up the title and then looks down at Chandler.]
Drago: I don't scratch anyone's back.
[Christiano throws the championship back down on Chandler and steps out of the ring.]
Nelson: And there goes Chandler's sure thing insurance policy! Once again, another backfire on Chandler's fault.
Hart: Hey, it beats actually trying to win!
Nelson: It's time for our last commercial break of the night. When we come back, it's our main event as Chazz Mendel steps into the ring against The one and only "Hot Shot," Chris Michaels!
I'm Not Your Friend, Damnit
[After an hour or so of fruitless searching, Chris Michaels spies Christian ducking into a locker room and follows suit. As he enters, dressed in his ring attire, Christian is seen preparing himself for prayer. He turns as the door opens, facing a smiling Chris Michaels]
Chris Michaels: Hey Christian – you know you're a hard man to track down. I've been looking for you all night!
Christian Roman: Sometimes I don't want to be found; can you blame me?
Chris Michaels: Erm, no, I suppose not. But listen, I was just wondering if you knew anything that could help me out against Chazz tonight. I know you and him have been sparring with one another over the last couple of weeks, and anything that you can do to help me out, pal, I'd much appreciate it.
Christian Roman: [sighs] When are you going to learn, Chris?
Chris Michaels: What do you mean?
Christian Roman: I'm not here to help you; I'm not here to wait on you; I'm here to restore cWo's legacy, not the legacy of a failed superstar.
Chris Michaels: [at the close of the sentence, Chris's face contorts into anger] Hey man, you listen here. I thought we were a team – we've been working hard together over the last couple of weeks to put those two guys out of their misery. I'm just following your lead.
Christian Roman: [angrily] I don't want you to follow me! Don't you get it? We're no team – we never were a team! I'm going down a road that you can't follow – one that I wouldn't want you to follow even if you were running on all cylinders. I don't care about you, Chris, and I don't want you to poke your nose into my business any longer.
Chris Michaels: Your business? Your business? cWo is my home, Christian, and maybe you've forgotten that on whatever quest it is you're off on this time. But you listen here, man, I'm not doing this for me – I'm doing this because you inspired me. But you know what? I don't have to sit here and listen to your well of lies anymore, anyway. Maybe you're as full of [expletive] that Chazz is saying you are.
[At this, Christian rises from his seat and briskly approaches a glaring Chris Michaels, returning the gaze as he stands an inch or so from his face]
Christian Roman: I never asked for you to be inspired. I never asked for you to believe me. I do what I want because I feel it's necessary and because I feel that it's right. That's my own decision; just like it's your own to choose to believe me or not. I don't care what you think, Chris. Do whatever you want. Just remember something out there tonight: you're walking into the lions' den tonight and frankly, I don't care enough about you or Chazz Mendel to risk what I'm preparing. Especially on someone like you. Now, if you'll excuse me.
[Christian turns his back to an obviously stunned Chris Michaels as the scene fades to black]
[Commercial break]
Chazz Mendel vs. Chris Michaels
[We return from commercials to see John Pilchard standing in the ring with his head down, as the Toronto crowd boos loudly and near unanimously.]
Nelson: We're back from the break ladies and gentlemen but during the break John Pilchard came out to the ring.
Hart: He did, and in a big shocker he hasn't even opened his mouth yet! He's just..standing there.
Pilchard: What did I do wrong...
Hart: There he goes.
Nelson: Sssh.
[Pilchard stands in the ring, still looking down at his feet.]
Pilchard: What did I do that was so wrong...
[It's clear fans have made up their minds on booing Pilchard instead of listening as they continue to jeer.]
Pilchard: What did I do, that was so damn horrible that it's still acceptable to treat me like dirt after last week?
[As Pilchard continues he becomes more excited, he begins staring choice fans in the eyes as he paces around the ring.]
Pilchard: If I were to bring out a woman who had just been raped would you boo her too? Maybe I should bring a widow down to this ring so you can treat her like a criminal too. Like she..like she did something wrong!
[As Pilchard becomes more animated his voice gets louder, fans boo louder to try and down out the sound of his voice.]
Pilchard: The John Pilchard of last week was not the John Pilchard you see today or on any other day! I was forced to say things I didn't mean, hear things that I should never hear! I was forced to experience feelings I should never feel. I felt...fear. Fear of what Heretic wanted with me. Fear of what Johnny Serious would do for a World Title. Fear of what my own best friend Nick Dangerous would do to me! Heretic turned my world upside down and everything that valuable in life fell to the floor and shattered to pieces. And it's all Johnny Serious' fault!
Nelson: Are you kidding me!
[A ruckus is heard among the crowd, offended by the notion introduced by Pilchard as Pilchard continues.]
Pilchard: Oh yeah! If you cross a bear in the woods Johnny, you don't make a sound. You quietly walk away and you don't distract him from his activities. When Heretic won the World Title, all we had to do was not look, not pay attention, but you provoked him. He asked for something to play with and you presented it to him, and because of that decision the entire cWo is suffering and you damn near ruined my professional and personal career!
[Pilchard becomes impassioned as he puts his hand to his mouth to prevent himself from completely blowign a gasket. He takes a deep breath as he continues.]
Pilchard: Because of you, Heretic last week gave Nick Dangerous an opportunity to throw over a decade of friendship down the drain! And for what! A defaced title? Well I hope it's worth it Johnny! Sleep won't come easy when cWo is dead, and dead all because Johnny Serious wanted to beat his old high score!
Nelson: If I'm not mistaken Johnny Serious fought Nick Dangerous head on to save John Pilchard!
Hart: Maybe you should go up there and remind him.
Nelson: I'm not sure I wanna get personally involved in all this.
Pilchard: The reason I'm out here is to introduce a true friend. Introduce to this ring the one man who had the stones to go against what's "cool" and stand up for a friend. Stand up for what he believes in. The only man who Heretic can't break, and a man who's about to face Chris Michaels. And Chris don't think I've forgotten about you either. I don't have to be Nick Dangerous' best friend to know that he's gonna walk all over you in two weeks at Hell and Back! Just like Chazz Mendel is gonna walk all over you tonight, and make you feel what I felt last week. Only difference is no one is gonna come and save you...
Nelson: Well the fans as I've come to expect aren't on the same side as Pilchard here tonight.
["Tiger the Lion" by The Tragically Hip hits the PA system. Gord Downie's voice croons over the music.]
"This is Tiger The Lion..."
"Give me the knuckles of Frisco..."
"If there's danger in the language, Gentlemen..."
"I suggest no further use of the two way radio..."
[The song kicks in and Chazz Mendel makes his way out. He enters looking somewhat flattered by John Pilchard as Pilchard passionately continues.]
Pilchard: Ladies and gentlemen I present to you, the only wrestler in cWo who gives a damn, the greatest wrestler to step foot in a cWo ring and my! Best! Friend! Chazz Mendel!
Nelson: Well Pilchard seems to be enamored with Chazz Mendel now.
Hart: It had to speak volumes for him to have Chazz Mendel come to his aid after Nick Dangerous came out to destroy him.
Nelson: Which was a surprising act of courtesy on Chazz's part, and understandable for Pilchard to be so appreciative. But it makes no sense to praise Chazz Mendel for the same heroism Johnny Serious displayed at the same time.
Hart: Yeah? Well...Joel? Meet John Pilchard.
[John Pilchard sits on the second rope, allowing Chazz Mendel easy entry into the ring, as he passes the mic to Chazz Mendel.]
Nelson: Well if you thought listening to Pilchard was an ear full, looks like Chazz has something on his mind as well.
Mendel: Thank you, John. And don't you mention it. Three weeks ago I said to the world that I was a man of action, and I did what I said I would do. I acted! I saw the injustices perpetrated by Heretic, Johnny Serious, and much to my dismay, Nick Dangerous, and I couldn't stand it! I couldn't stand the fact that they would actually let this man [Chazz points to John Pilchard.] suffer. And over what? A title shot? No man should bleed for that belt! Let alone a man like John Pilchard! The entire situation was disappointing. But as much as our friend, Nick Dangerous, has disappointed the two of us... There's one more man that I have more contempt for in this situation. And that's Christian Roman!
[The fans offer a mixed reaction as Chazz pauses. Some cheering for the namedrop, others booing Mendel's words.]
Mendel: The way I see it, while Nick's actions were more than a bit questionable, I have to question the actions, or lack thereof, of Christian Roman! Where were you, buddy? Why weren't you out there saving the day? Did that little light of yours finally blow out and you got lost in your own tangled web of lies? It was another week, and another blown chance at actually coming through with something, Christian. While you're acting all cryptic and mysterious, I'm out here making it happen, making a difference! Being selfless! You know what that means, right? It means that you put yourself over others! Or was that part of the fairy tale you didn't read?
[Chazz pauses briefly, and shakes his head disapprovingly. The crowd boos loudly.]
Mendel: What if I didn't show up, Christian? What do you think they would have done to John Pilchard? Huh? What do you think they would have done? They wouldn't have just patted him on the back and tell him they're just kidding, that's for sure! They would have torn him apart! They would have made an innocent man BLEED if it wasn't for ME! I'm putting that on you, Mister Christian. Mister "Savior."
Nelson: Wow, those are some mighty critical comments coming from Chazz Mendel.
Hart: You can say that again. But like he's been saying all along, Chazz Mendel is the real savior of cWo!
Mendel: But your trial will take place in my hometown. And Christian, in Vancouver, I'm judge, jury, and executioner! Tonight, I'll give you a little glimpse! Chris Michaels, I know you don't want to do this, but get out here! Let's stop delaying the inevitable, shall we?
[Chazz tosses the microphone over to Mic Benson as "Superstar" by Saliva starts playing through the PA system. Chris Michaels appears on the stage looking a little nervous. The crowd start to cheer his arrival. He surveys the crowd, then looks at the ring.]
Mic Benson: Making his way down the aisle, from Roanoke Virginia! Weighing in at two hundred and twenty pounds... He is The Hotshot, CHRIS MICHAELS!!!
[Michaels reaches the ring, and is a bit tentative walking the ring steps.]
Nelson: Chris Michaels doesn't look like he wants to do this. But Chazz Mendel is looking ready to go!
Hart: A man of action is always ready for anything, Joel. He's on a mission, and even Chris Michaels knows he can't stop him!
[Michaels is finally in the ring, and Mic Benson makes a quick exit. John Pilchard remains at ringside to cheer on Mendel as Senior referee Johnny Williams calls for the opening bell.]
DING DING DING
Nelson: Both competitors are in the ring now, and I must say, Chris Michaels doesn't look ready for this.
Hart: I would be scared too if I were Hotshot. Earlier tonight, Christian Roman more or less turned his back on him, and Chazz Mendel still has Nick Dangerous in his corner.. I think...
Nelson: Either way, there's no turning back for either man now. Our main event is under way!
[Mendel walks out from his corner to the center of the ring, taunting Michaels, who still looks a bit unsure of himself. Mendel shakes his head, disappointed at Michaels, who suddenly charges Mendel! Chazz quickly counters, and takes Michaels down with an arm drag.]
Nelson: Textbook arm drag by Chazz Mendel. Chris Michaels tried to bait chazz Mendel, but Mendel has those cat-like reflexes.
Hart: He's always one step ahead Maybe two! He does have John Pilchard in his corner.
[Mendel tries to apply pressure to Michaels' arm with an arm bar. Michaels is able to get his arm free quickly.]
Nelson: Arm bar! But Michaels is out of immediate danger with that quick counter!
[Mendel and Michaels get up to their feet. Mendel immediately moves in, and the two lock up.]
Nelson: Mendel, being the aggressor, goes in and the two lock up in a collar and elbow tie up.
[Gaining the advantage, Chazz puts Michaels into the corner. Mendel is trying to get free to lay in a punch, but Michaels puts his foot on Chazz and kicks him away.]
Nelson: Michaels creates a little space between he and Chazz Mendel before Mendel has a chance to do any damage. Michaels really is wrestling smart here in the early going.
Hart: Yeah, outside of charging at Chazz Mendel like a lunatic, and Chazz almost breaking his arm for it!
[Michaels and Mendel circle the ring once again, with Chazz baiting him. The two lock up again, and Chazz immediately turns it into a headlock.]
Nelson: Textbook headlock!
[Michaels tries to get Chazz to let go, but Chazz floats around and grabs the same arm and puts Michaels in an arm wrench.]
Nelson: Ooh! That looks pretty nasty! Chazz Mendel just wrenching up and the arm of Chris Michaels. He's picking his spot, and attacking it. Right now, it's Michaels' arm.
Hart: He should just go after Chris Michaels' heart and get it over with!
[Michaels grabs Chazz's hand behind him, trying to reverse it. To no avail. Michaels takes a step to the side, then throws an elbow.]
Nelson: And Chris Michaels just rocked Chazz Mendel with that back elbow! He didn't see it coming at all!
[Mendel lets go of the arm wrench, and Michaels takes him down with a scoop slam.]
Nelson: And Michaels with a scoop and a slam! And Michaels immediately puts Chazz in an armbar of his own!
[Michaels tries to get to his feet, but Michaels applies pressure, keeping him at one knee. Mendel gets to his feet and tries to reverse, but Michaels keeps the pressure on the arm and shoulder. Chazz hits a thumb to the eye and reverses into a wristlock.]
Nelson: And Mendel gaining the advantage once again thanks to a thumb to the eye. Referee Johnny Williams is issuing Mendel a strong warning for that. One more, and he's disqualified.
Hart: He tried to throw a punch, but that old fart made it look like he was hit with a thumb to the eye! It's tragic... How the mighty have fallen...
[Michaels with a quick reversal, and sends Mendel into the ropes.]
Nelson: Michaels reverses the hold, and an Irish whip!
[Michaels telegraphs a back body drop, but Mendel leapfrogs him.]
Nelson: Sunset flip! First pinfall attempt of the match.
ONE
TWO
[Michaels kicks out.]
Nelson: Early two count for Mendel. Michaels telegraphed the back body drop, and Mendel once again took the advantage.
Hart: And once again Chris Michaels is showed why he should have stayed behind his computer, and away from the wrestling ring.
[Mendel complains of a slow count to Johnny Williams. John Pilchard also makes his way over to voice his displeasure in the count as well]
Nelson: Now Chazz and John Pilchard are complaining of a slow count. By my calculations, that count was about as perfect as can be.
Hart: Listen Joel, I know you're new and all, but that was way too slow!
[Pilchard points at Michaels, who's starting to get to his feet. The cameras catch him saying "Put him out to pasture already!" Chazz laughs a bit and agrees. As Chazz turns, he's met with a right hand to the stomach, doubling him over.]
Nelson: What a right hand by Chris Michaels!
[Michaels takes Mendel down with a snap suplex. He floats over into a pin.]
Nelson: Pinning combination!
ONE
[Mendel kicks out.]
Nelson: And almost a two count!
[Michaels picks Chazz up and Irish whips him.]
Nelson: Michaels going back to that Irish whip.
[Mendel rebounds off the ropes, and Michaels leapfrogs him.]
Nelson: Did you see the elevation?! The Hotshot with an impressive leapfrog!
Hart: He's gonna feel that in the morning!
[Mendel comes off the other side of the ropes, and Chris Michaels uses takes him down with a power slam.]
Nelson: And using Chazz Mendel's momentum against him, Chris Michaels takes down Chazz Mendel with a powerslam! He's starting to look like the old Hotshot again, don't you think?
[With Mendel on the mat, Michaels looks for the top rope. The fans start to cheer as he makes his way over. Michaels climbs to the top rope, but John Pilchard climbs up and grabs Michaels' foot.]
Nelson: John Pilchard is grabbing the foot of Chris Michaels, stopping him from inflicting more damage to Chazz Mendel! Get him out of there ref!
Hart: It's obvious that you never had many of them, because this is what friends do for each other! They watch each other's backs.
[Mendel shakes off the cobwebs as Michaels finally kicks Pilchard off of the ring apron.]
Nelson: And there goes John Pilchard! I'm sure we'll hear about this.
[Michaels sets himself back up, but Mendel leaps up onto the top rope with him.]
Nelson: Superplex! Chazz Mendel with some great atheticism of his own, leapt up onto the top rope and superplexed Chris Michaels to the mat! That has to be it! Mendel is rolling onto Michaels.
ONE
TWO
[Michaels kicks out!]
Nelson: That was two and three quarters folks! Chris Michaels still has some fight in him after being superplexed off the top rope! Chazz can't believe it either. He's is back in the referee's face. They're jawing back and forth.
[Chris Michaels out of nowhere with a schoolboy pin.]
Nelson: Schoolboy!
ONE
TWO
[Mendel kicks out!]
Nelson: And Chazz Mendel kicks out! Chris Michaels came out of nowhere with that pinning move. He has some resiliency, doesn't he Robbie?
Hart: Apparently.
[Mendel rolls up to his feet quickly, and charges in on Michaels, who's still on one knee. Michaels comes up with a shoulderblock to Mendel's midsection, then hooks him for the "Why Me?"]
Nelson: The crowd is electric! Chris Michaels! Why Meeeeeeeeeeeee??
[Mendel with an elbow to the face of Hotshot.]
Nelson: No! Mendel breaks the hold with that elbow.
[Mendel with a quick kick, doubling Michaels over.]
Nelson: Kick to the stomach...
[Mendel hooks Michaels head and drops Michaels head first to the mat with the Dangerous DDT.]
Nelson: DANGEROUS DDT!!! Michaels is out! That's all she wrote!
[Mendel covers Chris Michaels.]
Nelson: That's it! Lateral press, the leg is hooked!
ONE
TWO
THREE
DING DING DING
Mic Benson: Ladies and Gentlemen, the winner of the match, "The Villain Of The Year" CHAZZ MENNNNNNNNDEL!!!
[Tiger The Lion starts to play as John Pilchard gets in the ring, clapping. Pilchard raises Chazz's hand in victory.]
Nelson: Well that's it! Chazz Mendel has defeated Chris Michaels!
Hart: Like anyone doubted he wouldn't.
[Mendel walks over to the ropes, and demands the microphone from Mic Benson.]
Nelson: Mendel has the microphone now.
Mendel: I told you... I told everyone! Now it's hero time. Come on out, hero!
[Mendel stands and waits. Nothing happens.]
Mendel: Come on! Get your ass out here! I just beat the crap out of your friend! Come save him!
[Mendel waits. Still nothing.]
Nelson: Who is he waiting for? Christian Roman?
Hart: Obviously. But I guess Mendel didn't see earlier tonight when Roman and Michaels had their confrontation. Roman didn't seem too interested in anything but his own agenda.
[Mendel starts to look impatient. He then looks over at Chris Michaels, and gives him a kick in the ribs!]
Mendel: Is that what you're waiting for?! You want me to get a little violent? You want me to make you look a little more heroic? Fine! I'll play your game! Let's go!
[Mendel drops the mic, and stands up Chris Michaels.]
Nelson: Oh god. A second Dangerous DDT from Mendel. He's trying to bait Christian Roman out here. He's got to come. Someone has to put a stop to this!
Mendel: Was that enough? Come on, "savior" save this man!
[Mendel stands tall, looking at the stage. Pilchard grabs Mendel and tries to get him out of the ring.]
Mendel: No, John! I don't want to wait till To Hell and Back! I want to go right now!
[Mendel still waits. There's no response. The crowd is booing, and starting to throw things into the ring at Mendel and Pilchard. Mendel turns to them.]
Mendel: I don't know why you're throwing things at me. This isn't my fault! [Mendel kicks Michaels again while he's down.] Where's YOUR hero?!
[Mendel looks at Chris Michaels, disgusted.]
Mendel: Fine... He doesn't think you're worth it, Chris... Nobody does... Time to pack it in, and call it a career. The cWo that you once stood for is dead and gone. The cWo that Roman wants to save obviously isn't yours. Yours doesn't glorify Roman's name. That's all he wants to save. And I assure you, Chris... I promise you... That after to Hell and Back, there won't be enough of Christian Roman left for anyone to save...
[Mendel drops the microphone on Chris Michaels as Tiger The Lion starts up again. Mendel and Pilchard both start to exit the ring.]
Hart: Where in the world is Christian Roman?
Nelson; It looks like Chris Michaels may be on his own, and that's a very unfortunate thing for not only Michaels, but for cWo.
[Chris Michaels comes to and slowly crawls out of the ring.]
Hart: I can't believe you like this guy!
Nelson: To me, he's always represented what was good in this organization.. and to see him treated like this is a slap in the face to all cWo fans!
The test
"Yeah I get it you're an outcast…"
Nelson: Well, we knew it was going to happen sooner or later, but it looks like it's time for Josh Cantrell to play Heretic's sick game!
Hart: It's a test, not a game!
["The Sound of Madness" by Shinedown roars from the PA as the lights dim and red fog fills the entrance way. "The Product of Hate" Josh Cantrell steps out through the curtain to a very mixed reaction.. The house lights slowly rise as a very determined looking Cantrell makes his way to the ring not acknowledging any reaction from the crowd be it positive or negative. He steps through the ropes and takes a microphone from Mic Benson who then exits the ring. Cantrell walks over to the ropes and leans out looking at the crowd.]
Josh Cantrell: Ya know…I quit school in Eight Grade, the day I turned Sixteeen years old. I was two years late starting school to begin with cause my old man stayed drunk all the time and kept forgetting to register me. Then all through school I was picked on and made fun of because of the bruises and scars the son of a bitch left on me, so as soon as I was old enough I quit. That's why I was a little concerned when I heard that Heretic has a test for me, to see if I truly am willing to do whatever it takes to get a shot at the cWo World Championship. I wasn't worried about what it is, cause I'll do what ever it takes... but I forgot my pencil.
[This draws laughter from the crowd but the mood is suddenly soured by the sounds of "Living in the Sunlight, Loving in the Moonlight" as the sick smile of Heretic comes through the curtain and he has Phantasy by the arm dragging her behind him drawing massive boos from the crowd.]
Nelson: What on Earth?
Hart: I don't like where I think this is headed, I mean I don't know for sure but what ever Heretic has planned for her can't be good.
Nelson: At least she's trying to fight him off but this tiny woman is no match for our World Champion.
Hart: Don't say "our" he might be yours but he's not mine.
[Heretic climbs up the ring steps pulling Phantasy up behind him as she continuously tries to jerk away only causing him to tighten his grip. As they steps through the ropes an obviously irate Cantrell steps towards them but Heretic snatches Phantasy by the hair and wraps an arm around her neck. Cantrell stops dead in his tracks when Heretic begins to scream "I can break her neck!" Cantrell throws his hands up backing off a bit and Heretic relinquishes the grip around her neck but keeps hold of her arm as a ring attendant brings him a microphone.]
Nelson: This poor girl looks scared to death and you can clearly see the concern on Josh Cantrell's face.
Hart: I don't know the story between the two of them, but if someone I cared anything at all about was within a mile of this madman I'd be concerned too.
Heretic: You see, Josh. I used the wrong word. This isn't a test, it's a SACRIFICE. I asked Johnny Serious to destroy someone he hated, and he couldn't do it. But Joshua, I want you to do the opposite. If this… this BELT.. means ANYTHING to you. If lifting the DARK CLOUD is your priority, if you TRULY want the shot, you'll be willing to make a SACRIFICE!
Heretic: Johnny Serious couldn't destroy someone he hated to get a shot at me… so the question is, Josh, can you destroy someone you LOVE?
Nelson: No… don't tell me he's gonna..
Heretic: All you need to do, Josh, IS MAKE PHANTASY BLEED!
Nelson: Oh my god! He can't be serious…
Hart: He is, and if this were 6 months ago I'd have a witty comment about Women and blood but this is just too much.
Heretic: GO!
[The boos are so loud small children cover their ears as tears stream down Phantasy's face and Cantrell just stands there with a blank expression on his face.]
Cantrell: I…there's no…
Heretic: Oh come on, PRODUCT OF HATE! It's a SIMPLE TASK! HIT HER! YOU KNOW YOU WANT TO!
[Cantrell looks at Phantasy as she slowly backs away.]
Heretic: Thinks of all the ARGUMENTS you've had! You've ALWAYS WANTED TO DO THIS! HERE'S YOUR CHANCE!
[The crowd explodes as Johnny Serious and Jacob Baxter rush towards the ring causing Heretic to push Phantasy into the corner and roll out to the floor. Serious gets between Cantrell and Phantasy. Serious gets in Cantrell's face and begins to shout.]
Nelson: Here comes Serious, hopefully he can stop whatever could possibly happen here!
Hart: Wait, why is Baxter with Serious?
Serious: ARE YOU SERIOUS? You can not be SERIOUSLY thinking about doing what he wants you to do!
[Serious turns around and tells Phantasy to get out of the ring but before she can Cantrell grabs Serious by the arm and spins him around, Serious shoves Cantrell and Cantrell takes a swing but Johnny sidesteps and Cantrell clocks Phantasy square in the nose drawing blood.]
Nelson: Oh my God!!! We need medics here NOW!
Hart: Did he just do that? Did he really just clock her in the face? Why is Baxter with Serious?!
[The crowd boos as Phantasy drops to the mat and holds her face, as blood oozes out from between her fingers. Cantrell immediately drops to his knees and tries to console her, but she tries to push him away. Baxter and Serious stand in the ring, both stunned, as Heretic claps.]
Heretic: YOU DID IT! CONGRATULATIONS, JOSHUA! YOU DID IT!
Hart: Congratulations? Did Cantrell just pass Heretic's test? And why is Baxter with Serious?!
[Cantrell looks up, at Heretic, in total shock.]
Cantrell: It… It was an accident!
Heretic: WAS IT REALLY?
[Heretic laughs and starts to walk back down the aisle, sidestepping medical staff as they rush to the ring.]
Nelson: Well, just when you thought Heretic can get any lower, he just caused an injury to an innocent woman.
Hart: Cantrell caused it; he’s the one who clocked her in the face!
Nelson: Well, I would have preferred my first show end on a happier note, but we’re out of time. For Robbie Hart, I’m Joel Nelson and we’ll see you next week!
[The camera shows Cantrell distraught over the fallen Fantasy. He mouths “I’m sorry” over and over as the medics tend to her and the show goes off the air.]
Driven
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