Intro

Well my boss called me up and said to come into work.
I just hung up on that slave-driving jerk.
I'm goin' to Rasslin!
Goin' to Rasslin!

You think I'd rather be sweatin' on the dock?
Or watching somebody use a hammerlock?
I'm goin' to Rasslin!
Goin' to Rasslin!

R-A-S-S-L-I-N That's Rasslin'

I like to watch ASM smash his axe off the corner post
And that Hooligan kick delivered by Jacob Baxter
Johnny Serious and Muru are what I like the most
And the alley opp and aeroplane spin like only Thaddeus Walker can!

Boss called again said it's time and a half if you come in tonight
I just had to laugh
I'm goin' to Rasslin!
Goin' to Rasslin!

R-A-S-S-L-I-N That's Rasslin'

Well my girlfriend called and friend she could be a model for Fredrick's of Hollywood
But she was hassled, really hassled!
Said I could come over early and stay real late
But I told her honey if we got a date we're goin' to rasslin
Goin' to Rasslin!

R-A-S-S-L-I-N That's Rasslin'

As Chazz Mendel when he's really high in flight
Cool as Ice Devon Dice when he's out there struttin'
Big Ronnie Wilkins must be seven foot nine!
I wouldn't miss this for a dozen girls.
I wouldn't miss this if for nothin'

I said Honey I hope you ain't hurt
She said I'm puttin' on my rasslin' shirt
I'm goin to rasslin!
Goin' to Rasslin!

R-A-S-S-L-I-N that's Rasslin!

Well last night I dreamed my life was over
There were golden streets and fields of clover
And the lights, they were dazzlin'.
I looked for ol' Prophet Mohammad at the pearly gates
I found a note that said I won't be too late
I'm goin' to Rasslin'
Goin' to Rasslin!

R-A-S-S-L-I-N that's Rasslin!

There's the gigolo Mike Logan with all his lovely ladies
There's Nick Dangerous with his trademark armbar
And I'll never forget the classic battles of seven years ago!
Two champions Chris Michaels and Notorious JON
Mohammad told me as he let me in
From now on, every Thursday, Karl, we're goin' to rasslin
Goin' to Rasslin!

He spelled it
R-A-S-S-L-I-N that's Rasslin!

Boy if I'd known this was gonna happen I wouldn't have bought these advance tickets!
Hey Mohammad, will all my virgins have a ringside seat?
Is ole' JJ gonna be up here any time soon?

R-A-S-S-L-I-N that's Rasslin!

[The camera pans around the the Bank Atlantic Center in Sunrise, Florida, as fireworks go off from the ceiling shooting towards the stage. The stage alights on both sides, then fireworks erupt from both sides of the cWo tron. The camera then focuses on the crowd, highlighting such signs as “The house won” “Ain't no cure for the Summertime Bruise” and “Mike Logan sucks” The camera then focuses on Joel Nelson, Peter Tiger and Robbie Hart seated at the announce position.]

Nelson: Ladies and Gentlemen welcome to cWo Driven! We're coming to you live from the Bank Atlantic Center in Sunrise Florida! I'm Joel Nelson and with me are my broadcast partners Peter Tiger, and Robbie Hart. We've got a great night of wrestling action coming your way and let's start by talking about tonight's main event!

Tiger: You got it, Joel. And what a main event it is! We've got the United States Champion Devon Dice going one on one with "The Canadian Gigolo" Mike Logan! Last week we saw Devon Dice proclaim that the man who made the pinfall in last week's main event tag team match, be it Mike Logan, Victor Emmit, or Chazz Mendel would get first dibs if you will, on a United States title match. Of course we all saw Victor Emmit score the pinfall on Chazz Mendel.

Nelson: We also saw Chazz Mendel get attacked by Notorious JON in the closing moments, sealing the deal, and the title shot for Victor Emmit.

Hart: That's what friends are for! They help you out no matter what!

Nelson: Regardless, I'm sure we'll see some kind of fallout from that. On top of our main event, we've got a great match up between Barrett Hawk, and Detroit Jack Gibson! Both men have had their share of struggles over the passed few months. Gibson of course with Thaddeus Walker and the Televsion...

Hart: That's Radio!

Nelson: Sorry, Radio championship... And Barrett Hawk with his intense feuds with Mr. Rich and Mike Logan. But Peter, Barrett Hawk has a whole new sort of animal on him in Andrew Phillips.

Tiger: You said it! The Comeback Kid has Barrett Hawk in his sights, and it making the most of his every opportunity to beat down Barrett Hawk every chance he gets! But we all know "The Simple Man," he won't go down without a fight. If it's a fight that Andrew Phillips was looking for, then he picked the right man to tangle with.

Nelson: Yes he has. Barrett Hawk is a warrior, no doubt about that. Also on tap we have Johnny Vandal taking on Brother Shabazz in singles competition. Vandal is coming off of the destruction of Damien Xavier Machiavelli, and Brother Shabazz is...

Hart: Probably just getting out of jail, AGAIN..

Nelson: Well, after scoring a cheap win over Jen Diamond at Glory, Lana Lexington announced her retirement from the women's division last week, and clams she is ready to bridge the gender gap and become a crossover superstar.

Hart: If anyone can do it, it's Lana!

Nelson: This is just an obvious dig at Jen Diamond's success as US Champion. Lana Lexington has nothing in her background to indicate that she has the ability to hang with male wrestlers.

Hart: It's in her DNA!

Nelson: Well, her opopnent tonight is supposedly a regional male superstar, so let's send this one to Donna Dixon for the introductions!

Dixon: The following is an intergender match and is scheduled for one fall. Introducing first, from Boston Massachucets, here is LAAANAAA LEXINGTON!

[The crowd boos as "Unbreakable" by Fireflight plays and pyros go off around the entrance ramp. The booing intensifies as Lana Lexington steps out from behind the entrance ramp and strikes a pose. After a few seconds, she breaks the pose and runs full speed to the ring, jumping onto the apron and then doing a flip over the ropes. She puts her arms up, causing the crowd to boo more, then responds by blowing kissing and waving.]

Dixon: And her opponent, from Daytona Beach, Florida here is... DR. BUTCHER, MD!

Nelson: Doctor Butcher?!!

Hart: Oh no, what's lana in for?

[Ominous music plays as the lights in the area dim. As the music picks up, the curtain flutters and Dr. Butcher MD steps onto the ramp, all four feet, five inches of him.]

Nelson: WHAT?! That's a midget!!!

Hart: They prefer to be called little people!

Tiger: What a joke this is! And here we were thinking she would wrestle a legitimate male superstar.

Hart: He's male! And how do you know he's not legitimate? You hate midgets, don't you?

[The crowd boos loudly as Dr. Butcher climbs into the ring and removes his blood soaked white jacket. He points viciously at Lana as the bell sounds.]

DING DING DING

Nelson: Well, yet another fraud by Lana Lexington is underway!

[The two circle each other. Dr. Butcher charges, Lana sidesteps. The two go to lockup, with Lana bending down to put her arms on the small man's shoulders. She feigns a struggle, then shoves Dr. Butcher back several feet. Dr. Butcher growls and then charges at Lana, where he's met with a drop toe hold. Dr. Butcher quickly gets back to his feet, and is then taken down by a baseball slide by Lana Lexington!]

Hart: Lana's really holding her own!

Nelson: Fans, we apologize for this one. It's insulting on so many levels.

Hart: Dr. Butcher MD is a fine athlete!

[Dr. Butcher gets back to his feet and the two once again circle each other. Lana goes for a lockup, but Dr. Butcher slides under her grasp, then steps down hard on her right foot. Lana hops up and down on her left foot, and Dr. Butcher quickly gives her a kick to the shin which drops her to her knees!]

Hart: Uh oh, Dr. Butcher's got the momentum!

Nelson: Somehow I don't feel that this wil last long.

Tiger: There's only so much kicking of the shins one can do before their opponent finds some defense.

Nelson: Really, Peter?

Tiger: Hey, I'm trying to at least make it sound interesting!

[Dr. Butcher gives lana a chop to the chest, then another. Lana staggers on her kees as Dr Butcher goes to the ropes. He bounces off with a crossbody, but he's caught by Lana!]

Hart: Look at the power of Lana Lexington!

[Lana gets to her feet, stil holding Dr. Butcher, and gives him a running powerslam.]

Hart: Lana Lexington just powerslammed a man!

Nelson: Robbie, he weighs less than a hundred pounds!

Hart: So? He's a man, isn't he?

[Lana flexes to the booing crowd.]

Tiger: I'm glad this crowd here tonight at Driven knows better than to give this charade any positive feedback!

[Dr. Butcher stirs, Lana kicks him hard in the side, flipping him onto his back. Lana motions to the crowd and applies a modified STF!]

Hart: It's the flexi lexi! Lana's got him!

[The referee slides into position in time to see Dr. Butcher tap the mat rapidly. ]

DING DING DING

Dixon: Here is your winner... Lana Lexington!

Hart: Lana is now 1-0 against male competition!

Nelson: Lana Lexington continues to make a mockery out of this business.

Tiger: She had the nerve to call the women's division a joke, and then she pulls this? Personally, I can't wait until she's put in her place.

Nelson: You and me, both. Let's hope that'll come sooner rather than later. cWo fans, last week John Pilchard defintiely gave us all a lot to talk about.

Hart: How about that woman he brought out to beat the brazeer off of Cassie Charisma?

Nelson: There was that, and then there was that crock he called the Mac Johnson Five Minute Challenge.

[A replay is shown of Tony Rios hooking Mac Johnson in a Boston Crab.]

Nelson: New face Tony Rios was seconds short of surviving the challenge when John Pilchard got involved...

[The replay wraps up as we see John Pilchard raking the eyes of Rios.]

Tiger: But the story didn't end there, and it shouldn't have. Shortly after the match, Jason Duran met up with Rios backstage for this interview...

[The camera see's Tony backstage, he is sitting in a chair feeling down about the result of his match. Tiffany Tolberg walks in and stands next to Tony Rios.]

Tolberg: We are here with the man who had just lost his opportunity at a cWo contract. He lost a five minute Mac Johnson challenge, we would all like to know how you are feeling right now.

Rios: You really want to know how I feel? Jason, how would you feel if you lost an opportunity to do something that you have always dreamed of?

Tolberg: I understand what you mean, but luckily for me I love my job even though some people are easier to deal with than are others.

Rios: Yeah lucky for you, but you have to look at my situation, I had my opportunity at a contract to wrestle for the cWo, but thanks to some underhanded business, a great opportunity for me was ruined because of jealous individuals. John Pilchard saw his meal ticket in trouble and screwed me out of my contract even though I won the match against him.

Tolberg: I think you were screwed out of a opportunity to wrestle for this great company by two men that are afraid of you.

Rios: You could be right about that, but Mac Johnson is a talented wrestler, he just knows deep down his challenge was survived by me. His buddy Pilchard saved him from sure defeat. However, I plan not to rest until I am given a fair shake and earn the contract that I truly deserve. I heard Pilchard dare me to show up next week and mark my words I will be there, I can promise you that.

[Tony finishes speaking as the scene fades and goes black.]

[Backstage we see Jason Duran armed with a microphone as he looks into the camera, behind him, to his right stands John Pilchard and Mac Johnson.]

Duran: I'm backstage with John Pilchard, and John...you saw the interview, what are your thoughts...

Pilchard: Hmmm, here's a thought. Mac Johnson and I are officially cancelling the Mac Johnson Five Minute Challenge. Tony Rios did show up backstage tonight, coming to me like Mac and I made some kind of mistake, we got security and we threw him right back out of here! I've repeated the rules ad nauseum, I made it clear why Tony Rios is currently not a cWo wrestler and yet people like you keep asking me stupid questions. Mac Johnson and I are exploring new avenues to get people talking about Mac Johnson.

[The camera slowly zooms out, as we see the woman who attacked Cassie Charisma last week performing quick hindu squats in her green and black wrestling attire. Duran gives her a curious look, then looks to John Pilchard.]

Duran: And what about....her?

Pilchard: Jason. John Pilchard is not just a manager. John Pilchard is a brand. To the right of me is a man who makes every cWo Champion nervous, except for the Women's Championship. Pro wrestling is no longer just a man's game. This is the woman that's going to change the face of Women's wrestling.

[The camera focuses on the woman doing squats as John continues.]

Pilchard: I found her months ago fighting unprofessionally in Philadelphia knowing one of these days she's going to make me a ton of money. Five foot five, one hundred and fifty pounds. She's a time bomb no one can read. An unstable, reckless animal! You saw what she's capable last week and that was only the beginning. Known to her victims as "The Butcheress", her name is Nox Bones, and she's cut the Women's division to shreds, and set it on fire.

[Duran looks at her in near intimidation.]

Duran: So why did you choose Cassie Charisma as her first victim?

Pilchard: We chose Cassie Charisma because...

[Nox stands up and pauses from performing her squats, as she shoots a look at Pilchard that even causes him to stop for a moment. Aggressively she takes the microphone from John Pilchard and she looks angrilly at Jason Duran.]

Bones: Because PRETTY GIRLS! Make good head mounts!

[Nox shoves the mic into Duran's chest, pushing him backwards as Pilchard nods his head. The trio walks away from a startled Duran as the scene fades out.]

[Jason Duran stands backstage with Jen Diamond.]

Duran: I'm here with the woman who seemed to put the women's division on notice last week, Jen Diamond. Jen, the fans want to know, what inspired that tirade from you last week?

Diamond: I thought it was pretty straightforward. One of our so called top talents came out and gave a piss poor effort, and I wasn't gonna have that. But what Is aid was true, Jason, this division needs to be cleaned up. There are a few girls who treat the business like it's a joke, like they're just here for a fashion show, and I've worked too damn long to let that slide. We saw a joke of a match earlier from a certain Ms. Lexington, a match that was an insult to ANY woman who's ever tried to compete in a male dominated enviorment, whether it be sports, business, entertainment, you name it.

Duran: What about the comments we heard earlier form the Women's Champion?

Diamond: [laughs.] Maddie knows she's on borrowed time. She avoids Bellatrix for weeks, now suddenly wants her in a rematch? Let me tell you why, because she knows what kind of effort she'd get. You kow what we call Trixie backstage, Jason? The green giant, emphasis on GREEN. If Maddie wants to suddenly be miss fighting champion, great.... just make her face someone who's in it to win it, someone who'll really give her a fight. If Maddie's so tough, why doesn't she-

[Jen stops talking and looks up to see Bellatrix Drake, who stands in front of her.]

Diamond: Look what the cat dragged in.

Bellatrix: B'fer last week, I prayed to da goddess, ask't her ta give me guidence. She sent me ta' you.

Diamond: What?

Bellatrix: I need yer help. 'Tis you she wants. 'Tis you who are to show me m' destiny.

Diamond: You want ME to help YOU?

[Bellatrix nods.]

Bellatrix: Aye. Tis' the will of tha' goddess.

[Jen walks away, deep in thought. Bellatrix hesistantly follows her.]

DING DING DING

Dixon: The following contest is scheduled for one fall…

[“Murder Was The Case” by Snoop Doggy Dogg plays over the arena, and J.J. Carter is seen heading through the crowd and down towards the ringside area.]

Nelson: This is a bit of a surprise. Carter is not supposed to be out here.

Hart: Leave it to J.J. Carter to interrupt Brother Shabazz’s path to glory.

Tiger: Well, Shabazz several times has interfered with Carter, preventing him from winning a couple of matches now.

Hart: Ah crap, he’s coming over here…

[Carter has jumped over the security barrier, and now walks over to the announce table. He grabs an extra chair and an extra set of headphones.]

Nelson: And as my partner Robbie here has so rudely put it, we are joined now by J.J. Carter.

Carter: Hello guys, how are you all?

Nelson: Not too bad. And yourself?

Carter: Things have been better. But I can only just keep looking forward to the future.

[“Triumph” by the Wu Tang Clan comes out over the arena, and then Brother Shabazz steps out from backstage. He is waving a Pan-African flag as he marches on down to the ring.]

Dixon: Introducing first – from New Haven, Connecticut and weighing in at 205 pounds – BROTHER SHABAZZ!!!

Carter: I just hope for all of the fans - and us - he doesn’t come out and start quoting Marcus Garvey or whatever.

[Shabazz enters the ring and just stares down Carter. But the lights go black, suddenly laughter (that of Johnny Vandal's) is heard over the sound system, which is spliced into "Hysteria" by Muse. The lights beam to the entrance where Johnny Vandal emerges. Two streams of bright pyrotechnics shoot up endless amounts of sparks before two loud bangs cease the activity. Johnny Vandal then makes his way down the ramp and towards the ring.]

Dixon: And his opponent – from Las Vegas, Nevada and weighing in at 225 pounds – Johnny Vandal.

Nelson: And here is a man who has been the center of a lot of controversy around here lately.

Tiger: For being one of the so he claims ‘highest paid superstars’ in the company, he is really making things quite difficult.

Hart: The man is holding both these guys down. It’s time for them to rise up and fight back.

Nelson: Remind me when you actually come up with a valid argument on anything Robbie.

Tiger: Both these guys are in the ring now, and we’re about to get under way…

DING DING DING

Nelson: These two are now locked up in the center of the ring. Shabazz now reaches down to give Vandal a few side chops in the kidneys. But Vandal moves away and breaks up the lock.

[Vandal now charges after Shabazz. But Shabazz grabs him by the arm, and delivers a snap mare – followed by a kick to the back.]

Nelson: Did Shabazz just make a little bit of a scream there?

Carter: That was strange.

[Shabazz gets up, but walks right into Vandal and gets a jawbreaker for it – followed by a reverse DDT.]

Nelson: So far it’s been all Vandal here in the early going.

[Vandal tries to grab Shabazz’ legs, but Shabazz is fighting off a possible submission move.]

Carter: Too soon for that.

[Instead, Vandal goes for the elbow drop, then tries to put Shabazz in a submission move on the upper body. But Shabazz continues to fight him off. Shabazz then throws a powerful elbow to the face of Vandal. He grabs his face, as Shabazz gets up off the ground.]

Nelson: And Shabazz with a rather powerful blow to Vandal. Didn’t look like it from here, but Vandal’s reaction says otherwise.

Carter: He can make a few good hits here and there.

[But Vandal kicks him in the shin, and Shabazz loses his balance. But Shabazz quickly regains his composure, springboards off the second rope, and lands on top of Vandal.]

Nelson: That was a pretty neat move there.

Tiger: And now Vandal up, but walks right into Shabazz…

Nelson: German suplex!

[Vandal slowly gets up again, but Shabazz grabs on to him once more.]

Nelson: Axe handle smash!

[Vandal lies down on the mat, rolling around for a minute. Meanwhile Shabazz turns over towards the announce table and starts pointing at Carter.]

Nelson: What is he saying?

Carter: He’s saying what am I going to do to him? Answer, nothing. I know what I am doing, and I’m not going to run in on his match. Let him taunt all he wants.

[Shabazz is still pointing at Carter and challenging him to come into the ring.]

Tiger: Aaron Blake is now looking at Shabazz, wondering what he is doing.

Nelson: Vandal is getting up. Already on his knees right behind Shabazz, and…

Tiger: Oh.

Nelson: Low blow. Aaron Blake didn’t see it.

[Shabazz is rolling around on the floor, while Vandal goes to grab him off the mat.]

Nelson: VANDALISM!!!

Tiger: This one’s over…

ONE

TWO

THREE

DING DING DING

Dixon: Your winner of this matchup… JOHNNY VANDAL!!!

Nelson: Well J.J., you was right. You didn’t have to do much of anything.

Hart: That’s not right…

Carter: I know. Shabazz is a bit of an idiot, and he’s fallible. He just wants to gain the upper hand. Now pass me that microphone over there.

[Carter stands up, now with microphone in hand.]

Carter: Hey Shabazz. Yeah, I know I don’t have to do anything to you. You manage to screw it up for yourself.

[Shabazz turns around and is on his knees, to look at Carter.]

Carter: So, you and me. We will have our final showdown pretty soon. However, this is going to be under my rules. We’re going to do this fair and square, once and for all. No more sneak attacks backstage, no more getting hit in the head with the ring bell before the match, no more cheap shots. Just you and me in that ring, settle this score. See who is the better man. I already talked to Tony Awesome about this, and if you screw up – or send someone to do your dirty work – you lose 20 thousand dollars. I know how much money means to you, so if I was you I wouldn’t get reckless.

Nelson: Wow…

Tiger: I’ll be looking forward to this one.

[We now head backstage, to find Mad Maddie standing in her usual spot – out in the truck bay, smoking a cigarette and holding a bottle of whiskey. She turns and sees the cameraman along with Jason Duran, and just gives off a sigh.]

Maddie: Well, you guys always know where to find me.

Duran: [not pictured] I’m sorry, I was just sent out here. You know the routine.

Maddie: Well, let me just say this. The first week after I beat Bellatrix, all the critics kept storming out. Crying shocked because I am still the champion. Once again, I was not expected to win. How many times will people doubt me? How much more do I have to do to prove to everyone that I am legitimately the top woman in this company?

[Maddie takes another drag of her cigarette.]

Maddie: Yeah. I still have this here.

[She points to her championship belt, draped over her right shoulder.]

Maddie: But everyone else, all the fans and all the experts… they just wanted to ride out Bellatrix on a white horse and have her take the golden throne off me. Everyone thought she was this unstoppable monster, incapable of being defeated. And then I knocked that bitch out, left her right in the middle of the ring out cold. Some people call that a fluke, but well I enjoy proving the idiots and the doubters wrong. People can keep hating on me all they want, I’m just gonna do my own thing.

[She pauses to take another drag.]

Duran: How do you think your match with Bellatrix compares with the rest of your cWo career?

Maddie: I’m not going to lie, that was the most difficult match of my career. She’s a tough competitor. But in the end, she is as fallable as everyone else. You can look as good as you want fighting scrubs like Natalie Mercer and Evette, beating up random people like Shannon Crowley too. But welcome to the big leagues there Trixie. She lost to me, and then she didn’t even try last week against Jen Diamond.

Duran: What do you think about that match last week?

Maddie: I think she became a bit too big based on expectations. You know? I have lost, no denying that. But you know, I don’t let it get to me. I fully agree with what Jen Diamond said. Trixie here needs to get her [beep] together, or just go home. Whatever happened to Miss Grant Me Vengenace, Miss Grant Me Revenge? One loss and all that just disappears?

[She pauses for another hit off her cigarette.]

Maddie: I know ever since she has gotten here, she has prayed to her goddess. Prayed for total domination and victory. Prayed for vengeance, prayed for everything. And now that one of her prayers has failed her, she just sits crying and feeling unanswered. So Trixie, you gonna just sit there and mope and wait for your goddess or are you actually going to stand up and be your own person? Come on hotshot, come make the world happy and take this belt off me. I dare you to try again.

[She takes one more drag of her cigarette before flicking it away, then walks right up into the camera.]

Maddie: Trixie, where is your goddess now?

[Maddie walks off, as Duran looks visibly shocked.]

Duran: [muttering under his own breath] She’s asking for it now…

"This is Tiger The Lion..."
"Give me the knuckles of Frisco..."
"If there's danger in the language, Gentlemen..."
"I suggest no further use of the two way radio..."

[The crowd pops as "Tiger the Lion begins to play, but the cheers quickly turn to boos as Reg Mendel Jr. steps out from behind the entrace curtain. He's wearing a tuxedo T-shirt with cutoff sleeves and he carries a mic with him. ]

Hart: Listen to those idiots! This is an improvement! Look at him, he's dressed to the nines!

Nelson: Well, last week we saw this man, Reg Mendel Jr, say he needed to speak to Notorious JON, and later in the night we saw his brother Chazz brutally attacked by the very man Reg Jr wanted to see!

Tiger: You have to wonder what the crucial information he claimed he had was.

[Reg Jr climbs into the ring.]

Reg Jr: Hey. How's everyone doin'. I know you're all wonderin' what's this guy doing out here all dressed up, what's he got that pelican suit on fer? Well, I'll tell ya what i'm doin' out here. Last week I gave Notorious JON all this information that was up in my skull and in my brains and he was so happy I did it, he went ahead and named me pastor of ceremonies for Face Turn!

Nelson: Think he means master of ceremonies?

Reg Jr: I dunno what a pastor of ceremonies does. God bless you folks, I guess. Anyhows, so I got myself a new gig here, no more settin' up the ring fer me. So yeah, I guess without any further undo, here's the best friggin' band on the friggin planet, if you don't agree I'll break your friggin face, Face Turn!!

["God Gave Notorious JON" begins to play and the crowd boos as all of the members of Face Turn come to the ring. One by one, they climb into the ring and salute the crowd with the metal horns. Finally, Notorious JON follows Victor Emmit into the ring and takes the microphone away from Reg.]

Notorious JON: Now, I've tried to be a good sport about things. For the last few weeks, I've let all the jokes roll off my chest. Whenever a certain leaked audio tape was mentioned, I was the first guy to take full accountability for the incident. As a bad, we put the incident in our reear view mirror and have been trying to spend out time promoting our upcoming release. But still, no matter where I look, there's that tape again! Youtube remixes, animated versions, it seems no matter how many DCMA takedown notices I send, this thing is gonna be around for a while! So instead of doing what's within my rights and suing the entire internet, I feel that the best course of action is to go right to the source!

Nelson; If his actions last week were any indication, we already know where this is going!

Hart: Let him finish!

Notorious JON: We all know Devon Dice was the one who leaked the tape. But let's be honest here, Devon Dice is a chooch. There's no way he could plan this from start to finish. No, there was a bigger peice to the puzzle, there was a big glaring question, "Who gave the tape to Devon Dice?" It was a mystery, we couldn't put our finger on it until last week, one brave young man had the courage to reveal the truth to us. Reg, tell the people what you told me last week.

Reg Jr: Alright so check it out. It went down like this. I'm makin' some extra money, ok? I'm carrying this sound equipment from one of the trucks with all the big equitment and realtor reels and dnds and stuff and suddenly this tape comes fallin out of the machine. So I listen to it and it's like holy crap on a friggin pole, ya know, here's Notorious JON gettin all fluttered and yellin and screamin'. So naturally I think "hey I know who'd wanna hear this" so I give it to the one guy I know that'd use it.

Notorious JON: And who was that?

Reg Jr: My brother, Chazz.

Notorious JON; Chazz Mendel?

Reg Jr: Yeah totally. So I says to Chazz, I says "hey ya know this is some sensible material, we can't let people hear it." And he says "don't worry i'll take care of it," and he goes ahead and gives it right to this Denton Dice guy. I'm like "what the heck are ya doin Chazz" and he's like "screw that guy. "

Notorious JON: So Chazz Mendel could have destroyed the tape or turned it over to me and instead chose to give it to Devon Dice? That's what you're telling me?

Reg Jr: Damn right he did, I couldn't believe it. I mean I'd never do that to you. Sure I sell those knockoff t-shirts but those are only five bucks, I totally respect you guys.

Notorious JON: I gotta tell you, I was heartbroken when I heard this! You could see it in my reaction last week. I respected Chazz Mendel, I thought he a righteous dude, but he ends up being another fake. Another mainstreamer afraid of what the power of rock n' roll can do to affect the world in a postive way! He fears what this band can do to, the message we of unity we bring to the world, so he tries to shoot the messenger!

Nelson: Bringing unity to the world? We haven't even heard a single song from these guys!

Tiger: Unless you count that very poor cover song they play as their entrance.

Hart: I have! You guys are just too lame to go to the shows!

Reg Jr; I got it, though. Chazz, I totally know why he did it, too. It was our unbringing, ya know? How our dad raised us.

Notorious JON: I'm sure it was. Of course a man like Reg Mendel is going to produce such a rotten offspring, while casting his better son aside. Reg Mendel took a young man, in his prime, full of potential, and threw him out with the garbage! Well, I'm a father myself, my daughter, Lana Lexington, is a model citizen, as well as an extremely talented superstar wrestler! I know talent when I see it, I know potential when I see it, and looking at this young man here, I can tell you, Reg Sr., that you backed the wrong horse! If you don't want to call this young man here your son, then I will!

Nelson: Notorious JON is adopting Reg?!

Hart: Wait, going from Reg to NJ... I don't know how I feel about this.

Reg Jr: Yeah old man, I don't need you anymore! In fact I ain't gonna be Reg Mendel Junior anymore.. I'm just Reg Mendel, you're the friggin junior, old man! Notorious JON's the friggin' father of the year, as far as I'm concerned. Me and Llama Lexginton...

Notorious JON: Lana.

Reg Jr: That's what I said, Llama Lexington, we're gonna be the best kids a guy's ever had!

Notorious JON: Show them what I made made for you, Reg.

Reg Jr: Oh yeah. My ex father always would give me crap about this, but now I got the old man beat!

[Reg reaches into his pocket and pulls out an index sized business card covered in gold foil. He opens it up, revealing a popup image of himself.]

Reg Jr: Check it out!

Hart: It's beautiful!

Tiger: I don't think that would fit in a rolodex.

Hart: It's not supposed to be in a rolodex!

[The members of Face Turn all applaud.]

Notorious JON: So I hope everyone out there understands the situation a little better now. The cheap laughs you may have at my expense were brought to you by people who aren't even worthy of being called a family! I'm not laughing over this anymore, Chazz. As our album is only a few weeks away, I am formerly demanding that you cease and desist all anti-Face Turn activities, and I will consider any further action againsrt this band slander and and attempt to sabotage our album release! Furthermore, I, as well as Face Turn's attorneys, demand a formal apology for your actions!

Nelson: Oh please! Legal action?

Hart: He's an artist trying to make a living! Chazz is taking food off of his kid's table!

Notorious JON: Let this be a lesson to all of you out there that try to stand in the way of Rock N' Roll. Rock won't be censored. Rock won't be held back. In the end, Rock N' Roll will always prevail. Chazz Mendel, you won't stop us from playing our all ages show at the Alligator Alley tomorrow night at 9PM, you won't stop our album from going platinum and changing the world, and you'll NEVER stop us from making faces turn!

["God Gave Notorious JON To You" hits once again and the crowd boos as Face Turn start to make their exit from ringside. The cameras cut back to the announce team.]

Nelson: Well how about that! Reg Mendel Junior denouncing his own family, and exposing his own brother as the man who was behind the Notorious JON tirade!

Hart: I believe it! The Mendel's are soft! Yellow even! Reg just did himself a favor and got on the winning team! Did you see his shirt? Reggie Mendel is a true rocker of the highest caliber!

Nelson: Where are Chazz and Reg? Are they even here tonight?

Tiger: As far as I know, Joel, they're not here tonight! But I'm sure we'll get to the bottom of this as soon as word reaches The Mendel Family.

Nelson: Indeed. In the meantime, though, let's call some more great cWo wrestling action! Donna Dixon, take it away!

DING DING DING

Dixon: This match is scheduled for one fall!

["Do Or Die" by Revolution Mother starts playing as Detroit Jack Gibson comes walking out to some cheers from the crowd.]

Dixon: Making his entrance, weighing in at two hundred and thirty seven pounds. From Detroit Michigan! He is Detroit Jaaaaaack Gibsoooon!

Tiger: Jack Gibson does not look to be in good spirits tonight and how can you blame him?

Nelson: He's not exactly a fan favorite as you can tell by the crowd tonight...but I think even his biggest detractors would give him the right to be upset after Glory. Thaddeus Walker refusing a Television Title shot as schedulde for Detroit Jack Gibson, because he didn't broadcast his challenge on the radio?

Hart: Oh please guys they're two different worlds! No one on the radio can hear what we're saying right now!

Nelson: How is he supposed to broadcast on the radio Robbie?

Hart: Thaddeus doesn't seem to have a problem with it!

Tiger: Well I think the song is "video killed the radio star", not the other way around.

Hart: Yeah that was what, the eighties? It's called the Radio Championship for a reason!

Nelson: It's not the Radio Title! It's the TV Title and Thaddeus Walker is really walking on a controversial line here. Earlier tonight Jack Gibson had some rather poignant words for Thaddeus Walker. Let's take a look.

[The screen goes into picture in picture mode. Jack Gibson shows up on the screen looking directly into the camera.]

Gibson: Last week, Thaddeus Walker delivered a message to the world about the war was far from over. That we were destined to meet in the ring to settle this once and for all. Every word of that rings true. It's FAR from over. Thaddeus Walker, you ducked me once. I didn't think you were serious about this radio nonsense, but after trotting Colonel Sanders at Glory? That was the last straw.. If it's a radio broadcast you want, you got it! Next week, keep your dial tuned in to your favourite station, the sweet sounds of Detroit Muscle will be taking over the airwaves! And come Summertime Bruise, I'm going to crush you, and your pathetic resistance to take back the Television Title...

[The picture in picture fades out as Detroit Jack Gibson is in the ring, when the intro to Lynyrd Skynyrd's "Simple Man" hits the PA system. Fans in attendance anticipate the arrival of Barrett Hawk. Shortly after the intro, Hawk comes out with his trademark Texas Bullrope over his right shoulder, and a cowboy hat on his head.]

Dixon: And his opponent. Weighing in at two hundred and twenty pounds. From Sulphur Oklahoma. Barreeeeeett Hawk!

[Hawk continues down the aisle. He smiles and waves to the audience on his way down, slapping some hands as well.]

Nelson: And when was the last time we saw Barrett Hawk with a smile on his face?

Tiger: With Mr. Rich seemingly out of his life, Hawk's life must have improved ten fold.

Hart: I know one man who would wipe that smile off his face.

Tiger: I'm actually surprised to see Barrett Hawk in such good spirits tonight after being knocked out at the hands of Andrew Phillips two weeks in a row.

Nelson: cWo fans are buzzing about the returning Andrew Phillips and asking themselves why Barrett Hawk? Why come back after a long absence and victimize Barrett Hawk like this?

[Barrett Hawk throws his hat aimlessly into the crowd before entering the ring.]

Hart: Hawk is the kind of guy who just doesn't click with other people. People just don't like him, and you know I find it funny that you guys never blame Hawk for it. First it was Mike Logan, then it was Mr. Rich, now Andrew Phillips, people hate this guy, maybe it's time you realize that maybe it's Hawk's fault!

[Then, "Back in the Saddle" by Sebastian Bach hits the PA system.]

Nelson: Now wait a minute...

Tiger: We know this music guys!

[The music continues, when to loud boos comes Andrew Phillips. He walks sternly down the aisle, as Barrett Hawk leans over the top rope to look at him, talking inaudibly in his direction.]

Nelson: And here he is again, Andrew Phillips coming down the aisle.

Tiger: At least this time it's not from behind like last week!

Nelson: Yeah what a kind gesture...

[Andrew Phillips pays no mind to Hawk trying to shout at him when Detroit Jack Gibson swipes in from behind with clubbing forearms to Hawk's back. Aaron Blake calls for the bell.]

DING DING DING

Nelson: This time it's Detroit Jack Gibson from behind as this match is under way.

[Hawk turns to face Gibson, who continues hammering blows over a bent down Hawk's back. Gibson begins driving knees into Hawk's stomache.]

Nelson: Detroit Jack really letting it go right now.

Tiger: He's got a lot of pent up frustration!

[Gibson delivers more knees, bringing Hawk down to his hands and knees. Hawk tries quickly to get back up, as Gibson applies a headlock.]

Nelson: Side headlock applied...

Hart: Can you believe this! Andrew Phillips! Former World Champion joining us tonight!

[Gibson takes Hawk down with a headlock takeover. Meanwhile we hear a muffling of a headset.]

Nelson: I'm exstatic..

Tiger: Gibson showing some wrestling prowess here tonight.

[Hawk easily escapes the headlock on the ground with a leg scissors. Both men quickly rise to their feet. Hawk takes the upper hand, stunning Gibson with right snap jabs.]

Nelson: Hawk keeping Detroit Jack at bay with right handed jabs.

Hart: Would you relax Joel and give Andrew Phillips some time to talk?

[Nelson pauses for a moment as cameras shortly focus on a silent and focused Andrew Phillips at the commentary booth. Meanwhile with Gibson stunned, Hawk pushes him backwards into the ropes and whips him to the opposite side, which Gibson reverses into a whip of his own.]

Nelson: ...I don't think he's got a lot to say right now.

Hart: Sssshh sssh just give him time!

[Gibson catches Hawk and takes him down with a side slam.]

Nelson: We got a job to do Robbie! As Detroit Jack takes Hawk down hard with a side slam!

[Gibson stays on top of Hawk with a pin.]

ONE

Nelson: And a one count! Jack Gibson stays on point, bringing Hawk to his feet.

[Gibson brings Hawk up to a stand.]

Nelson: And Gibson with a whip...

[Gibson whips Hawk to the ropes, following him closely along the way, immediately off the rebound Gibson knees Hawk in the gut with a kitchen sink.]

Nelson: Takes Hawk down, as it looks like Andrew Phillips is gonna join us for some colour commentary.

[Gibson goes for a pin.]

ONE

[Hawk kicks out.]

Hart: Mr. Phillips, I gotta say this is a real treat!

[Still no response from Phillips as cameras again show him sitting silently with a headset on. Gibson brings Hawk to his feet, and slams him headfirst into the turnbuckle pad.]

Hart: No? Not ready yet?

Nelson: Well let's stay on the action here as Barrett Hawk's in a bad spot right out of the gate here.

Tiger: Detroit Jack's just pummeling on the midsection of Barrett Hawk with those boots. Andrew's distraction might have made tonight's match an easy one for the supposed number one contender to the TV Title.

[Detroit Jack whips Hawk to the opposite corner.]

Hart: Okay I can't keep it to myself, Andrew Phillips? We gotta know, why have you been attacking Hawk lately?

[Detroit Jack charges towards Hawk after colliding into the opposing turnbuckle. As he approaches, Hawk hits a back body drop over the top rope.]

Tiger: Whoa!

[Gibson manages to maneuver himself to land on the apron.]

Hart: Someone wanna borrow Andrew a headset? I think his is broken!

Tiger: Hold on a MINUTE!

[Peter's voice intensifies when Gibson is hit with a European uppercut which sends Gibson flying head first into the table, and falling down to the protective mat outside.]

Nelson: Things just took a turn in Barrett Hawk's favor with an uppercut that sent Detroit Jack slamming against our announce table!

Tiger: Don't you guys wanna help me get through to Phillips here so we can ask some questions?

[Referee Aaron Blake begins a ten count.]

ONE

Nelson: There's a match spilling out right in front of us, if he doesn't wanna talk there's nothing to hear!

Tiger: Don't look now, it looks like Phillips has Hawk's attention...

TWO

[Cameras see Hawk as he slowly closes in on Andrew Phillips. He looks to Phillips as the fans cheer loudly, who looks back, remaining seated throughout.]

Nelson: This could be a repeat of last week!

THREE

[A recovered Detroit Jack clotheslines Hawk from behind, sending him faltering to the guard rail behind and beside Andrew Phillips.]

Hart: Maybe he should keep his attention to the match! Turning his back on Gibson twice? What is he thinking?

FOUR

[Jack Gibson wraps his hands around Hawk's throat, choking him.]

Nelson: He's choking Hawk now.

Hart: This serves him right, Gibson making him pay for his mistake!

FIVE

Nelson: Referee counting both men to a possible disqualification.

Hart: Looking at Detroit Jack I don't think he minds.

SIX

Nelson: Alright that's enough!

[Gibson releases the choke, pulling him in for a knee lift. Gibson then pulls an exhausted Hawk towards the ring, and rolls him inside.]

Nelson: Getting back in the ring.

Hart: I gotta say I'm impressed.

[Detroit Jack goes for a pin.]

ONE

[Hawk kicks out early as Robbie continues to speak.]

Hawk tries getting Andrew Phillips' attention and he doesn't move an inch!

Nelson: Phillips isn't one to make a move on a man who's back isn't facing him.

[Detroit Jack Gibson begins choking Hawk.]

Nelson: Jack Gibson back on the choke.

[Aaron Blake starts a count.]

Hart: Giving Barrett Hawk a taste of home!

[Gibson stops near five...only to resume the choke. Fans boo as Gibson forces all his weight down on the neck.]

Tiger: Gibson better be careful here!

[Again, a near five count as Gibson releases the choke...Fans boo louder as Gibson reapplies the choke. Aaron Blake has enough as he physically pulls Gibson away.]

Nelson: Oh come on...

Tiger: Props to Aaron Blake, getting himself in the thick of it. Detroit Jack Gibson isn't the most approachable dude in the game.

[Detroit is on his feet arguing with Aaron Blake as Barrett Hawk coughs in the corner of the ring, lying under the bottom rope.]

Nelson: Aaron Blake needs to take a moment and remind Gibson that there are rules here!

Hart: He's well aware of the rules Joel!

Nelson: Then he should act like it!

Hart: Maybe you oughtta calm down Joel, former World Champion here!

Nelson: Oh stop it.

[Gibson pushes Blake aside as he resumes offense, laying kicks into the body of Barrett Hawk.]

Nelson: Gibson back at it. Stomping the body of the Simple Man...

[Gibson has his fill as he bends over to pick Hawk up by the hair. He stands him up, and backs him into the corner.]

Nelson: Now ramming his shoulder repeatedly into the gut of Barrett Hawk.

Tiger: Andrew Phillips' presence has to feel like a big dark cloud over this entire match for Hawk. He came down here with a smile on his face, ready to step into the next phase of his career, then Phillips, you came down here and the mood changed.

Nelson: Which undoubtedly the goal.

[Gibson stops butting his shoulder into Hawk's gut, as he then attempts a hip toss from the corner towards the center of the ring, but Hawk resists.]

Nelson: Gibson going for a hip toss...

[Gibson tries again, but Hawk continues to resist. Gibson tries a third time, and Hawk leaps to Gibson's side and attempts a reversal.]

Nelson: Reversal - no!

[Gibson then resists, Hawk punches Gibson in the gut, bending him over. Hawk puts his leg on the back of Gibson's neck, as Gibson stands back up, flipping Hawk backwards. Hawk lands on his feet, still with Gibson's arm in his grasp.]

Tiger: Nice!

[Detroit Jack quickly stays focused as he hits a short arm clothesline taking Hawk down.]

Hart: Booyah!

Nelson: Huge clothesline takes Hawk down!

Hart: Gotta be it!

[Gibson pins Hawk.]

ONE

TWO

Nelson: Hawk gets a shoulder up!

[Gibson slams his hands against the mat as Hawk painfully tries to sit up after that vicious clothesline. Gibson brings him to his feet and hooks him in for a vertical suplex.]

Tiger: Suplex time!

[Gibson hoists Hawk up, as Hawk spins around and manages to land on his feet behind Gibson.]

Hart: Look behind you Jack!

[Hawk places Gibson in a waistlock.]

Nelson: Gibson wraps around Hawk.

[Gibson reverses the waistlock with one of his own, then places Hawk in a full nelson.]

Hart: Time for a little Detroit Muscle!

[Hawk struggles in the full nelson as Gibson lets out a confident smile. While in the hold however, Barrett Hawk makes a dash for the corner. He crouches his head between the second and top rope, as Gibson's head collides with the top turnbuckle.]

Nelson: Clever escape!

[Gibson backs away stunned, but quickly shakes off the cobwebs and charges Hawk.]

Hart: Get back on him Jack! Oh-my-god! No!

[Hawk lifts Gibson up in the air with a flapjack, and on his way down hits a European uppercut.]

Nelson: There it is! That lethal European uppercut!

Tiger: The novelty of that move just doesn't wear off, every time the crowd sees it they love it like it's the first time they've seen it!

[Gibson is on the mat cold as Hawk points upwards, looking to the roaring crowd.]

Nelson: Hawk is in control now!

Tiger: He could have the three count waiting for him right now!

[Barrett Hawk then begins climbing to the top rope.]

Hart: Where you going Andrew?

Nelson: Someone ought to keep an eye on him...

[Cameras catch a glimpse of Andrew Phillips climbing to the ring apron to the side of Hawk, who keeps himself balanced on the top rope. Phillips grips the top rope, tempting to shake it as Hawk stands on top.]

Nelson: Now wait a minute..

Tiger: What's he doing?

[He and Hawk exchange glances as Hawk inaudibly speaks to Phillips. Suddenly by surprise Detroit Jack pushes Hawk's feet, causing him to land with the top turnbuckle between his legs.]

Tiger: Ooooh.

Nelson: ..Andrew Phillips just ruined this match!

[Gibson locks Barrett Hawk in a full nelson, pulling him out from the top turnbuckle and towards the center of the ring.]

Hart: Don't worry about Andrew Phillips, worry about this! Detroit Riot!

[Gibson hits his finishing move.]

Hart: It's over baby!

ONE

TWO

THREE

DING DING DING

["Do Or Die" plays as Gibson gets up, referee Aaron Blake holding Gibson's right arm up in victory.]

Nelson: And Gibson beats Barrett Hawk, with special thanks to Andrew Phillips.

Hart: I didn't see Gibson asking for help!

Nelson: Fact of the matter is Phillips played a clear factor in this match. Hawk arguably had it with that European uppercut.

Hart: He didn't have to let Phillips distract him!

[Gibson gestures a belt around his waist as he looks to the camera, talking trash, as we see Phillips standing on the apron looking down on a beaten Barrett Hawk.]

Nelson: Phillips now just looking at his victim, looking down on Barrett Hawk just like he looks down on everyone around him.

Tiger: I just can't piece together why Andrew Phillips would single out Hawk like this. Have they ever even met each other?

Nelson: It seems Barrett Hawk just can't catch a break. It's just one thing after another. You know if Andrew Phillips has a problem with Hawk why doesn't he take it in the ring? Why doesn't he face his problem like a man?

Hart: Andrew Phillips is a former World Champion, Joel. He has a certain seniority over Hawk. Why should he waste his time with Barrett Hawk when he can be wrestling for World Championships!

Nelson: Well Andrew Phillips is the instigator here. If he's so above Barrett Hawk I don't see the need to keep singling him out. We gotta take a break folks, but when we come back, it'll be Devond Dice! Mike Logan! Our main event is coming up right after this!

[Driven comes back from commercial break focused in on the announce table.]

Nelson: Folks we're back and we're just moments away from our main event! But first we have a breaking story regarding our World Heavyweight Champion Johnny Serious.

[Footage picks up of last week, where we see Mike Logan slowly emerging from the side of the ring.]

Tiger: Mike Logan took a lead pipe which was previously used as a weapon on Chazz Mendel by Notorious JON, and slammed it over the head of Johnny Serious, look here it is...

[We see the replay of Mike Logan slamming the pipe against the head of Serious.]

Tiger: Oh!

Nelson: We haven't seen Johnny Serious anywhere today, and we've just been notified that we have Johnny Serious' doctor on hand to provide us an update on his condition. Dr. Martin, thank you for joining us tonight.

[The screen splits as Dr. Martin corresponds with the announce crew.]

Dr. Martin: Thanks guys.

Nelson: I understand you oversaw the treatment of both Johnny Serious and Chazz Mendel, if you could just quickly brief us on the condition of both men.

Dr. Martin: I did, I had a personal look at both men and what I saw was that Chazz Mendel, while beaten up and has quite a bump on his head he was out the door on the same night and is cleared to get back to work. Johnny Serious is a more delicate case on the other hand.

Nelson: Did he suffer a concussion?

Dr. Martin: I can confirm he did suffer a minor concussion.

Nelson: Any idea of when he would be clear to wrestle?

Dr. Martin: I can't confirm any date right now, according to Johnny Serious this isn't the first time a blow to the head like this has taken him out of commission. He's been out on his own but has been keeping in touch with us regularly, and the official decision is not to clear him, and take things on a week by week basis, unfortunately I can't provide any exact date for a return.

Nelson: Well we here at cWo appreciate you taking the time to talk to us and let us know what you can.

Dr. Martin: Anytime guys, anytime.

[The split screen closes as we see Hart, Nelson and Tiger.]

Nelson: Well let's hope Johnny Serious can recover in time for Summertime Bruise.

Tiger: I'm feeling a real de ja vu here guys, it's disheartening to hear that just weeks after Muru had to relinquish his Championship before Glory. If this is a repeat issue Tony Awesome might have to make some changes around here, people can't keep getting injured like this.

Nelson: Well I find it appropriate that after hearing this news it's time for our main event. Perhaps retribution will find its way to Mike Logan in the form of Devon Dice.

Tiger: You have to think Mike Logan is a bit sour about this being a non-title match. Granted, it was Victor Emmit that scored the pinfall in last week's main event, securing the first shot at Dice's newly won United States championship. But as a man who two weeks ago was in the main event, battling for the world championship against Johnny Serious, you'd think that Logan would be more vocal about this becoming a title match.

Nelson: Regardless of what Mike Logan might think, a promise is a promise. Devon Dice has integrity, and as someone who lacks it, Mike Logan wouldn't understand.

Hart: Why don't you say that to his face, tough guy!

Nelson: Say what?

Hart: That he's got no integrity! Every woman that he satisfys is guaranteed at least cab fare! If that's not integrity, I don't know what is!

Nelson: Well after that enlightening piece of information, let's send it down to Donna Dixon one last time for our introductions!

Dixon: The following contest is our main event of the evening, it is scheduled for one fall and is a non-title match. Introducing first the challenger. Weighing in at two hundred and forty three pounds, from Hamilton, Ontario, Canada. "The Canadian Gigolo" Mike Logan!

[The lights dim and turn a cherry shade of red as "The Stroke" by Billy Squire begins to play over the P.A. system as we see "The Canadian Gigolo" Mike Logan emerge from behind the curtain wearing a long sleeveless black and red rhinestone robe with red and black short wrestling trunks plus sunglasses and Sabrina Swallows to the left of him. He then looks out at the fans with a smirk before gyrating his hips as the fans immediately begin to boo loudly upon his arrival while Sabrina swoons at his hip gyrations. Mike then smirks at the fans and begins to strut in a very arrogant and cocky manner toward the ring with his women in each arm. He then spots a camera and flexes a bicep for the camera before kissing it and resuming his walk to the ring. He stops to occasionally look out at the crowd with a brash smile on his face. He finally makes his way up the ring steps and walks along the apron before pausing and gyrating his hips again to more boos before he flicks the sunglasses into the crowd. He then struts to the middle of the ring and begins to do a pose, flexing his muscles as red pyro shoots out from the turnbuckles. Still smirking at the fans and their disdain, Mike removes his robe and gyrates his hips some more before thrusting his pelvis at the crowd to more boos and then runs against the ropes briefly before he heads to the corner and leans up against the turnbuckles awaiting his opponent as the music dies down and Sabrina is rubbing him down.]

Nelson: Mike Logan gets a shot at Devon Dice, but this is a non title match.

Tiger: With the title not on the line, we will see how Dice's efforts are.

Hart: He's supposed to be a fighting champion, defend the belt.

Dixon: And his opponent. Weighing in at two hundred and twenty pounds, from Atlantic City, New Jersey. The cWo United States Champion, Devon Dice!

[Clutch's "Electric Worry" blasts as the fans cheer loudly as Dice appears on the stage with the US title draped over his shoulder. He makes his way to the ring.]

Nelson: The well deserving champion, Devon Dice.

Tiger: He's earned it.

Hart: He should be defending it!

Tiger: You always thought not defending it was the smart play.

Hart: Bah!

[Dice gets in the ring and Aaron Blake calls for the bell.]

DING DING DING

Nelson: And we're underway.

[Logan charges Dice, Dice delivers a hip toss.]

Tiger: Nice hip toss.

[Logan to his feet, Dice delivers another hip toss.]

Nelson: And again.

[Logan to his feet, charges Dice, and Dice takes him down with an arm drag and locks in a shoulder lock.]

Tiger: Dice is showing off his technical skills.

Hart: Technically he's a moron.

[Logan grabs Dice and flips him to the mat reversing the shoulder lock.]

Nelson: And a beautiful reversal by Mike Logan.

Tiger: That was pretty.

Hart: That was awful!

Nelson: What?

Hart: I mean that was incredible!

Tiger: Do you just disagree with us?

Hart: NO! Dice got my head messed up!

[Logan to his feet, stomps Dice in the shoulder.]

Nelson: Big kick to the shoulder.

[Logan presses the arm of Dice against the mat and drops a big knee to the shoulder.]

Tiger: Logan is working that shoulder of Dice, going to make it tough to pull off some moves.

Hart: He's an intellectual.

[Logan lifts Dice up by his shoulder and delivers a shoulder DDT. He goes for a cover.]

Nelson: The cover

ONE

TWO

[Dice kicks out.]

Nelson: And Dice kicks out.

Tiger: Not a bad idea to try and steal a victory.

Hart: Steal? He let him out, he wants to punish him.

[Logan lifts Dice to his feet and whips him across the ropes. Dice leap frogs Logan, comes back across, baseball slides between his legs and pokes Logan in the eyes.]

Nelson: Dice showing some agility there.

Hart: And showing he's a cheat.

Tiger: I didn't see anything terribly out of line, and neither did Aaron Blake so pipe down.

Hart: Without me, you don't have the ratings.

[Dice grabs Logan and executes a suplex.]

Nelson: Big suplex, Dice makes the cover.

ONE

TWO

[Logan kicks out.]

Hart: What a kick out!

[Dice gets to his feet bounces off the ropes and lands a fist drop to the face of Mike Logan.]

Nelson: Dice just dropped a fist on the face of Mike Logan.

Tiger: That's old school.

[Dice grabs Logan by the head and lifts him to his feet and backs him into the corner. Dice backs up and charges and lands a dropkick in the corner.]

Hart: Come on Logan!

Nelson: That was a big dropkick.

Tiger: Indeed it was Joel, Dice is rolling.

[Victor Emmit is seen at the top of the ramp slowly making his way to the ring.]

Nelson: Wait a second, what does he have any business in this match?

Hart: He's scouting Dice, he gets first crack at the belt.

Tiger: I think he has more on his agenda than just scouting Dice out.

[Dice notices Victor ringside and begins yelling at him.]

Nelson: Dice is not happy Victor Emmit has made his pressence here.

[Logan walks out of the corner and chop blocks Dice's knee. Logan begins to stomp away at Dice.]

Tiger: Logan with a cheap shot, and Victor Emmit is just laughing.

Hart: Cheap shot or super ridiculous capitilization?

[Logan grabs Dice and brings him to his feet and performs a scoop slam.]

Nelson: Logan slams Dice to the mat.

[Logan lands a standing leg drop, gets to his feet, lands another leg drop. He begins to gyrate his hips.]

Tiger: Oh this is an awful sight.

Hart: The ladies in attendance beg to differ.

[Logan tries another leg drop, but Dice rolls out of the way.]

Nelson: And Logan misses!

Hart: His beautifully sculpted ass could be done for, Sabrina should massage it.

Tiger: Really?

[Dice gets to his feet, Logan to his he throws a punch, Dice ducks and sets up the Hard Eight. He slams Logan to the mat.]

Nelson: HARD EIGHT! Dice hit it!

Tiger: It's gotta be over.

Hart: Let's go Mikey!

[Dice covers Logan, Sabrina Swallows hops onto the apron and Aaron Blake runs over to him.]

Nelson: Damnit, it's Sabrina swallows!!

[Sabrina Swallows takes issue with Aaron Blake as the two argue by the apron.]

Tiger: What's going on here, Blake? Get a hold of the situation, Dice clearly has Mike Logan covered!

Nelson: Wait a damn minute!

[Emmit enters the ring by surprise, Dice stands up. Dice sees Emmit, Emmit charges him and lands the T.N.T]

Hart: HE's DYNAMITE!!! TNT!!!

Nelson: OH COME ON!

[Emmit pulls Logan over Dice and exits up the ramp. Sabrina hops off the apron.]

ONE

TWO

THREE

DING DING DING

Dixon: Here is your winner, Mike Logan!

Nelson: And Devon Dice is robbed tonight by Victor Emmit.

Tiger: Unbelievable.

[The Stroke starts playing again as Mike Logan rolls off of Devon Dice. Aaron Blake raises Logan's hand and points to him as Logan lays on the mat.]

Hart: Yeah, an unbelievably awesome win!

Nelson: Devon Dice was cheated, Robbie! He had this match won before Victor Emmit walked all over it!

Tiger: Unfortunately we can't go back and change things, but Devon Dice was a lone wolf tonight with the absence of Johnny Serious and Chazz Mendel.

Hart: So you're saying Dice would have cheated first if his friends showed up tonight?

Tiger: I'm saying that this could have been prevented.

Nelson: Well unfortunate for cWo the ratio between guys like Devon Dice and slime like Mike Logan are fairly imbalanced and Mike Logan leaves tonight's main event with his hand raised. We're out of time folks! For the broadcast team, I'm Joel Nelson, We'll see you next week on Driven!

[Driven fades to black with one last shot of Mike Logan beginning to celebrate his win.]